WHO CARES?

 

BY

 

HAPPY LITTLE MINION

 

 

 

Disclaimer: Don’t own ‘em, just take ‘em out to play with (to be returned when I’m damn good and ready… and basically unharmed)!  All hail Joss & Co., who do own ‘em, damn it! 

 

Rating: NC-17 for the smut factor!  (Someone has to get some!)

 

Pairing: Buffy/Tara 

 

A/N: This has been sitting around for a while as an ‘unfinished’ story… if you don’t like it, blame Mistress Drea for saying that it could be posted as it stands!  ; )

 

Summary: Hmm… Who cares?!  I just wanted another story with them together, that’s all there is to it!  : )

 

*****

 

Tara was hurrying across campus, heading towards her dorm from the library.  Head down in usual Tara fashion, eyes searching for things that go bump in the night.  She may have looked unaware of her surroundings, but she was very much on alert.  Being close to midnight, she was berating herself for losing track of time.  She almost missed the person slouched on the bench, just catching the shape out of the corner of her eye.

 

Buffy sat slouched on the bench totally oblivious to her surroundings, staring off into space, trying to forget about being in Heaven and her debauchery with Spike.  She never noticed Tara's approach as she pulled her knees to her chest, resting her head on her knees.

 

Tara did a double take, stumbling to a halt.  She quickly searched the area for any threats, thinking Buffy was using herself as bait.  That idea fled her head as she watched Buffy curl up and put her head down.  Her heart skipped a beat or two, and then lodged itself in her throat.  She took a deep breath and wiped a tear from her eye before she headed towards the Slayer. 

 

Tara coughed softly and started to speak in a gentle tone.  "I don't mean to startle you, 'cause that would probably get me hurt, so I'll just talk softly as I stroll on over." 

 

Buffy turned her head to the side, looking up at Tara as she stopped beside her.

 

"Mind if I sit?"  Tara sat as Buffy patted the bench beside her.  "At first I thought you were using yourself as bait, but I didn't see anything lurking about, except for me."  Tara looked around before turning back to Buffy.  "But, then I figured it out."  She smirked, tugging at Buffy's sleeve.

 

Buffy raised an eyebrow, never lifting her head.

 

Tara giggled as she reached out and flipped the hood of Buffy's red sweatshirt over her head.  "You were afraid to go to Grandma's house, 'cause you lost your little basket."

 

Buffy raised both her brows.  "Are you the Big Bad Wolf come to eat me?"

 

Tara's brows shot up as her mouth fell open.  She started to giggle at Buffy's innocent look.  "You are aware…"  She spoke slowly as she ran her eyes up and down Buffy's small form.  "That you're asking a lesbian that question?"  Tara gave her a seductive smile and winked.  "I'd probably just nibble for a while." 

 

Buffy's head snapped up, her eyes huge.  "Oh, God!"  She slapped her hands over a face that was starting to turn bright red.  "That was so not what I meant." 

 

Tara started to laugh as she sat back on the bench.

 

"Where’s shy Tara, and what have you done with her?"  Buffy peeked through her fingers at Tara's smiling face.

 

"I t-think she had a Xander m-m-moment."  Tara started blushing, lowering her head and letting her hair fall forward.  "I c-can't b-believe I said t-that."

 

Buffy uncovered her face, reaching out to push Tara's hair behind her ear.  "Don't."  She finally unfolded herself, putting her feet on the ground.  "Please don't hide."  She gave Tara a small smile.

 

Tara's eyes dropped momentarily, she took in a deep breath as she looked up into Buffy's eyes.  "I won't, if you don't?"  Tara held Buffy's eyes.

 

After a couple of moments Buffy shook her head slightly and a small smile came to her face.  "I don't think you'd let me."  She nodded her head and held out her hand.  "Deal."

 

Tara took her hand with an easy smile.  "Deal."

 

Buffy didn't release the warmth of Tara's hand as she looked down at their hands.  After a moment she looked up to find Tara's eyes also coming up from looking at their hands.

 

Tara locked eyes with Buffy.  After what seemed like hours, but was only about a minute, Tara squeezed Buffy's hand.  She smiled as she heard Buffy let out the breath she didn't know she was holding.

 

Buffy blinked and smiled at Tara.  "So, Ms. Maclay, may I walk you to your room?"

 

"Please."  Tara gave a lopsided smile.  "I would very much enjoy that, Ms. Summers.  Thank you."

 

Buffy stood and grabbed Tara's backpack, and then helped Tara off the bench.  "It would be my pleasure."

 

Tara moved her hand within Buffy's to entwine their fingers, giving her hand a slight squeeze.

 

Buffy looked up at Tara, and smiled.  Then she chuckled and smirked at Tara.

 

Tara raised a brow in question.

 

"So, you'd just nibble for a while?"  Buffy started to giggle as Tara blushed.

 

Tara started to laugh.  "You should have seen your face when you realized what I was talking about."  Tara butted shoulders with the Slayer.  "I don't think I've ever seen that shade of red coming from you before."

 

Buffy giggled, suddenly she snorted and started laughing, leaning into Tara.  "I can't believe either one of us said what we did."

 

"What, you don't think you're nibbleable?"  Tara giggled.

 

"Nibbleable?"  Buffy snorted.  "Is that even a word?"

 

Tara shrugged and chuckled.  "How 'bout edible?"  Tara wiggled her brows.  "Is that better?"

 

"I think the shy Wiccan has left the campus again."  Buffy smiled at Tara.

 

"Another Xander moment?"  Tara shrugged with a lopsided smile.

 

"Not quite."  Buffy grinned.  "You didn't have the glassy eyed ‘I'm in Fantasyland’ look in your eyes, and the drool running down your chin."

 

"I was afraid to go there."  Tara chuckled.

 

"Afraid?"  Buffy raised a brow.

 

Tara gave a seductive smile.  "I'd enjoy the visual too much."  Tara chuckled at the surprised look on Buffy's face.  "Why does that surprise you, Buffy?  You're a very attractive woman."  Tara bumped shoulders with her.  "Plus you have that whole Slayer thing going for you, very sexy."

 

Buffy blushed, and Tara squeezed her hand.  "Thank you."  Buffy squeezed back gently.  "It's nice to know I've been appraised."

 

"Oh!  You've definitely been appraised.  More than once." 

 

Buffy raised a brow.

 

Tara blushed.  "I said that out loud, didn't I?"

 

Buffy grinned at Tara.  "Yes, you did."  She squeezed Tara's hand again as she guided her up the steps to her dorm and held the door open for her.

 

Tara released Buffy's hand to unlock her door.  Pushing the door open, she stepped in, turning to see Buffy staring at her hand.  Tara watched for a moment.  She smiled as she flipped on the fairy lights, and went to light a few candles around the room.  Walking back to the door she reached out and took Buffy's hand, gently tugging her into the room.

 

Buffy looked up and blushed at Tara's amused look.  "Sorry."

 

Tara shook her head and reached for her backpack still on Buffy's shoulder.  "Would you like something to drink?"  She set her pack down and closed the door.  "There's juice, water, tea or coffee?  Coffee's instant, though."

 

"Water's fine, thanks."  Buffy looked around the room.  Tara had put up her fairy lights, but hadn't done much else with the room.  She still had boxes stacked along the wall.  Not many personal items were set out.

 

Tara got Buffy's water, turned and walked to her bed as she watched Buffy look around the bare room.  Tara sat on her bed and moved back to sit on the far side, against the headboard.  She patted the bed beside her when Buffy turned around.

 

Buffy raised a brow.  "Are you trying to get me into bed, Ms. Maclay?"

 

Tara smiled.  "Damn!  You figured out my devious plan."  She chuckled.  "I guess grabbing you and throwing you down on it, is out of the question?"  She held out the bottle of water for Buffy.

 

As Buffy reached for the bottle, Tara pulled it back slightly.  Buffy giggled.  "Is this your way of luring me into bed now?"

 

"I have to get you close enough to throw you down."  Tara smiled and wiggled her brows.  "You can sit in the chair if you want."  She handed Buffy the bottle.  "Personally I find the floor more comfy than the chair.  I think it was designed and built by the Marquis de Sade for torture purposes."

 

Buffy laughed as she sat next to Tara on the bed.  "I think they do it on purpose.  Give you the most uncomfortable chairs, so you don't fall asleep studying."

 

"I guess I can forget about that recliner I requested?"  Tara frowned as if upset. 

 

Buffy moved up against the headboard next to Tara.  "I think that will be a big no!"  She sipped her water.

 

"Damn!  I had the spot for it all picked out, too."  Tara stuck out her lower lip in a pout.

 

Buffy snorted.  "You should request it in person."  She reached out and lightly traced Tara's lower lip.  "Show them that pout, they'll give you anything you ask for."

 

Tara smiled as she reached up to take Buffy's hand.  "You think so?"

 

Buffy nodded.  "Definitely."

 

"Good."  Tara nudged Buffy's shoulder.  "Take off all your clothes."  She pouted again then broke out into giggles when Buffy's mouth fell open.

 

"I think research is in order.  We have to find out what happened to the shy Wiccan?"  Buffy nudged Tara's shoulder with a smile.

 

Tara laid her head on Buffy's shoulder.  "No research needed.  The shy Wiccan is still very much here."

 

Buffy squeezed Tara's hand, leaning her head against Tara's.  "That's good, 'cause I kinda like having her around."

 

"She'll be here for you."  Tara nodded her head, her tone soft but holding a note of promise. 

 

"I'm glad.  'Cause right now I think she's my lifeline."  Buffy squeezed Tara's hand.  "I think tonight was the first time I've laughed."

 

"Me, too."  Tara tilted her head a bit to look up at Buffy.  "It was nice to see the twinkle in your eyes again.  And I've really missed that laugh."  Tara smiled.

 

Buffy smiled back at Tara.  "It was nice."  Buffy looked around the room again, she set her water on the nightstand.  Turning back to Tara, she brushed the hair off her face and behind Tara's ear.  "How have you been?"  Buffy reached for Tara's other hand.

 

Tara watched Buffy's hand go down to hers.  She played with Buffy's fingers for a moment before shifting her eyes back to Buffy's.  "Pretty much like you, I guess.  Surviving day to day."

 

"You know, I didn't realize before, I miss you."  Buffy smiled at Tara.

 

Tara smiled and blushed slightly, squeezing Buffy's hands.  "I've missed you, too.  I've missed everyone."  Tara's eyes started to tear up.

 

Buffy released one of Tara's hands, putting her arm around her and pulling her closer.

 

The move of comfort from Buffy had the tears falling.  Tara buried her face in Buffy's neck.

 

Buffy pulled on Tara's other hand, getting her to turn in further.  Then she released her hand and wrapped her other arm around her.  "I didn't think about it, but when you left, you didn't just leave Willow, you left everyone."

 

That brought a sob from Tara, along with a nod.  Tara wrapped her arm around Buffy's waist, and grabbed her shirt in a fist.

 

Buffy rested her head against Tara's, rubbing her back.  "I'm sorry."  Buffy just held the woman, letting her cry herself out.  She didn't realize she had tears running down her own cheeks.

 

Tara released her grip on Buffy's sweatshirt, and pulled her head back a little to look up at Buffy.  She reached up and gently brushed the tears from Buffy's face.  She chuckled at Buffy's surprised look.

 

Buffy narrowed her eyes in intimidation.

 

That only caused Tara to start giggling.  "If only the vamps and demons of Sunnydale could see the Big Bad Slayer now."  She grinned at Buffy.

 

Buffy huffed.  "Sure, yuck it up."  She smiled at Tara.

 

"I like seeing this side of ‘The Slayer’."  Tara put her arm back around Buffy's waist.  "I'd bet not many see it?"  Tara kicked off her sneakers.

 

"No, they don't.  You're one of the chosen few."  She grinned at Tara.  "Now that you have, I'm gonna have to tickle ya."  She started tickling Tara.

 

Tara squealed and tried to squirm away from Buffy.  She tried to retaliate but couldn't do too much, she was laughing too hard.  "Uncle!  Uncle!  No more, please.  I can't breathe."  Tara was breathing hard trying to catch her breath.  She reached up and entwined her fingers with Buffy's.  Buffy was straddling her hips threatening to tickle again.  "No more, please.  Unfair Slayer advantage."

 

Buffy smiled down at Tara.  "I don't think tickling is a Slayer skill.  Then again, I never did get the handbook."

 

Tara chuckled.  "That pisses you off, doesn't it?  Never getting it?"

 

Buffy shrugged and laughed.  "I don't think I've ever followed the guidelines anyway, so if they gave me one I probably wouldn't have either.  Plus extra reading, you know how I am about the research."  She grinned.

 

"Maybe if they had one with pictures and diagrams."  Tara winked at her.

 

Buffy laughed and fell to the bed beside Tara.  "Probably still wouldn't have helped."

 

"True.  The demon books have pictures, but those don't thrill you either."  Tara released Buffy's hand, and ran her own down Buffy's leg that was still draped across her to her boot.  She looked back at Buffy.  "Did Dawn go to Janice's tonight?"

 

Buffy nodded.

 

"Good."  Tara grabbed the heel of the boot and pulled it off, throwing it on the floor.

 

Buffy raised a brow.

 

Tara sat up and reached for the other one.  "Bend your leg."  Though awkward, she managed to pull off the other boot when Buffy did.  Then she lay back down and grinned at Buffy.  "Then you don't have to go home tonight."  Tara rubbed Buffy's calf, and squeezed her hand.  "I don't want you to go."

 

Buffy nodded.  "I didn't want to go either."  She squeezed Tara's hand and moved her head to the Wiccan’s shoulder.

 

Tara smiled.  "That works out well then."  She kissed the top of Buffy's head.  "How 'bout I get us something comfy to sleep in?"

 

"I'm pretty comfy right now."  Buffy wiggled her head a little.

 

Tara chuckled and rubbed Buffy's leg.  "You can have your pillow back, I promise."  She kissed Buffy's head again.  "I have to get up anyway."

 

"Damn Mother Nature."  Buffy smiled at Tara as she moved off of her.

 

Tara squeezed Buffy's hand as she got up off the bed.  She went to the closet and pulled out two pairs of sweats, a couple towels, and face clothes.  Bringing them back to hand Buffy a set, she smiled.  "They'll be big, but they're comfy."  Tara went over to her desk, opened a drawer and pulled out a new toothbrush.  She turned to Buffy and held out the toothbrush.

 

Buffy looked at it, and raised a brow as she looked at Tara.  "Expecting company?  It's my color, too."

 

Tara opened the drawer again, stepping back so Buffy could look in.  There were two other toothbrushes in the drawer, one in Dawn's color, one in Willow's.  "Force of habit."  Tara shrugged.

 

Buffy nodded and closed the drawer.  "Lucky for me."  She gave Tara a small smile.

 

Tara nodded.  "Otherwise we'd have to share mine."  She smiled at Buffy.  "Whether you change here or in the bathroom."  Tara picked up her toiletries bag and headed for the door.  "I'm headed down the hall with the toothpaste and whatever else you might need."  She smiled at Buffy and opened the door.

 

"I'll change here and meet you there."

 

Tara nodded and closed the door on her way out.

 

Buffy met up with Tara in the bathroom after she changed.

 

Tara was grateful she hadn't quite started brushing her teeth.  When Buffy walked into the bathroom, Tara turned her head.  Suddenly she snorted, and burst into laughter.

 

Buffy stopped in her tracks.  She crossed her arms over her chest, tapped her foot, and scowled at Tara.

 

That ended up making Tara laugh harder.  She stumbled over to Buffy and turned her around, so she could see herself in the mirror.

 

Buffy glared at Tara in the mirror, she then looked at herself and started chuckling.  She turned back to Tara.  "Okay.  But it's still not that funny."

 

"It's is to me."  Tara kept laughing, wiping tears from her cheeks.  Buffy glared at her again, which had Tara falling into Buffy in laughter.  "You're not real intimidating when you look like that."

 

Buffy pouted.

 

"Now you look like a cute little kid, pouting."

 

Buffy narrowed her eyes again.

 

"Not gonna work, Slayer."  Tara turned and headed back to the sinks.

 

Still pouting, Buffy headed to the sinks.  "Not gonna win, am I?"

 

"Not this time."  Tara smiled and leaned over kissing Buffy's forehead.  "Now brush your teeth and wash your face."  Tara chuckled.  "Don't forget to wash behind your ears."

 

"Not funny."  Buffy pouted again.

 

Tara kept chuckling while they were in the bathroom.  Heading back to the room, Tara grabbed Buffy's hand walking down the hall.  "Don't want you getting lost."  She grinned at Buffy.

 

"Are you gonna make fun of me all night?"  Buffy's brows furrowed.

 

Tara squeezed her hand.  "Maybe."  She smiled at Buffy.

 

"Umm.  I meant to mention this when I went into the bathroom, but we know what happened there."  She glared at Tara, who smiled.  "Unless you have your key, I might have locked us out."  She stuck her lower lip out at Tara in a pout.  "Wasn't my fault, I didn't know it was locked 'til after I closed it."

 

Tara took a deep breath and let it out loudly.  "Kids."  Then she smiled at Buffy.  "Good thing you can break the doorknob, or I can magically unlock it.  But I'll show you something that's even better."

 

They stopped in front of the door.  "Reach about a foot to the left of the doorknob."  Buffy looked at her and Tara nodded.  "Now go up about three feet.  Put your hand against the wall and feel around."  She grinned when Buffy found the nail with the key there.  "Never get locked out that way."

 

"Cool!"  Buffy grinned and unlocked the door.  "Is that a glamour spell?"

 

Tara smiled and nodded.  "I see you're getting better with the magic knowledge."

 

Buffy found the nail and put the key back.  "I kinda had to, with my two favorite Wiccan's around."  Buffy smiled as she walked into the room and shut the door.

 

"Favorite?"  Tara grinned.  "How 'bout only?"  Then she frowned.  "I guess not anymore, though."  Tara set all her things on the desk, she shook her head to rid herself of thoughts of Willow and Amy.  "So, favorite?"  Tara turned back to Buffy and smiled.

 

"You're at the top of the list at the moment."  She smiled at Tara.  She waited for a big smile from Tara, and then she narrowed her eyes.  "But you're dropping fast making fun of me."

 

Tara pouted.  "Do I get points for thinking you're cute?"  She gave a lopsided smile.

 

"Oh God!"  Buffy dropped her head.  "I can't win."

 

Tara smiled and reached for Buffy's hand, pulling her towards the bed.  "Sure you can."  She pulled Buffy on the bed.  "Just not against me."  She grinned.  "Not tonight, anyway."  She settled herself under the blanket.  "Thanks for turning down the bed."

 

"Welcome.  Did you want me to put out the candles?"  Buffy hesitated getting settled.

 

Tara smiled her lopsided smile.  "Well you could get up and do that, or..."  She pulled Buffy down next to her.  "I can do it from here."  She wiggled her fingers at Buffy.

 

"Silly me."  Buffy smiled and covered up.  She settled back on the pillow and looked at the ceiling for a minute.  She turned her head to Tara.

 

Tara was looking at her with a raised brow.  Then she gave a lopsided smile and opened her arms to Buffy.

 

Buffy smiled and moved into her arms, resting her head on Tara's shoulder.  "Thank you."  She snuggled in closer.

 

"I told you that you could have your pillow back."  Tara kissed her head.

 

"You did.  And you were right about the sweats.  They are comfy.  Even if you do make fun of me."  She pouted.

 

"I'm not making fun of you."  Tara hugged her tight.  She reached down and tapped Buffy's thigh.  "Leg."  She pulled Buffy's leg back over her and rubbed her thigh.  "I just think you look really cute in those."  She grinned at Buffy.  "Even if you do look like a little kid."  She giggled.

 

Buffy pouted.  "Not little."  She stuck her lip out further.

 

"Goddess!"  Tara traced Buffy's lip lightly.  "You're adorable."  Tara whispered.

 

Buffy kissed Tara's finger.

 

Tara's eyes shot up to Buffy's.  She saw the twinkle in Buffy's eyes, and gave her a lopsided smile.

 

"I win!"  Buffy sounded like a little kid.

 

Tara chuckled.  "You win."  She ran her fingers through Buffy's hair.

 

Buffy snuggled closer and tilted her face up to Tara's.  "What do I win?"  She still sounded like an excited little kid as she smiled up at Tara.

 

Tara smirked and chanted something.

 

Buffy's eyes flew open, the smile left her face.  She blew out a breath when the candles went out.

 

Tara chuckled.  "I'm not gonna turn you into a frog."  She tapped Buffy's nose.

 

"You had me worried for a moment there."

 

Tara ran her fingers through Buffy's hair again.

 

"You would turn me back if you did though, right?"  Buffy looked up at Tara with furrowed brows.

 

"In a heartbeat."  Tara kissed Buffy's forehead.  "I wouldn't do it in the first place, but if you did get turned into a frog, in a heartbeat."

 

Buffy nodded.  "I knew you were a good witch."  Buffy smiled at Tara.

 

Tara gave a lopsided smile.  "It has nothing to do with being a good witch."  Tara shook her head.

 

Buffy raised a brow.  "It doesn't?"

 

"Nope."  Tara grinned.  "You know how many frogs I'd have to kiss, before I found you?"

 

"You'd do that for me?"  Buffy looked into Tara's eyes, seeing the twinkle, but seriousness, also.

 

Tara held Buffy's eyes and whispered.  "In a heartbeat."  Then she leaned forward and gently kissed Buffy's lips.

 

Buffy blinked and smiled at Tara.  "I win."

 

Tara nodded.  "You win."

 

Buffy leaned up and kissed Tara again.  She held the kiss a little longer.  She pulled back looking into Tara's eyes, she smiled.  "I like winning."

 

"You can win all you want."  Tara gave her a lopsided smile.

 

Buffy reached up and pulled Tara's head down to her.  "I want."  Buffy kissed her again, and again.

 

They pulled back taking deep breaths, Buffy looking into Tara's eyes.  She drew in a shocked breath, at the look of love she saw there.  She whimpered softly, leaned up and pressed her lips into Tara's again.  Shifting she moved Tara back to the pillow, not breaking the kiss.  She rose above Tara tilting her head she trailed her tongue along the Wiccan’s upper lip.

 

Tara moaned softly.  She parted her lips slightly.

 

Buffy traced the parted lips asking for entrance.

 

Tara moaned again, reached up and ran her fingers through Buffy's hair.  With her hand on the back of Buffy's head, Tara moaned, parted her lips, and pulled Buffy down to her.

 

Buffy moaned when Tara let her in.  Slowly she explored Tara's mouth.

 

Tara slowly broke the kiss.  Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes to look into Buffy's.  Taking a few more deep breaths, Tara moved Buffy back to her lips.  This time Buffy moaned as Tara thoroughly explored her mouth.  Slowly they broke the kiss.  Tara giving a couple of gentle kisses, smiled at Buffy.

 

Buffy opened her eyes slowly.  "Wow!"  She whispered, breathing heavily.

 

Tara nodded her head, smiling as she panted for breath.  "I'll second that."

 

Buffy gave her a quick kiss and rested her head on Tara's shoulder.

 

Tara ran her fingers through Buffy's hair, she kissed her forehead.  "Are you okay?"  She rubbed Buffy's back.

 

Buffy nodded her head and kissed Tara's neck.  "Oh, yeah!"  She grinned at Tara.  "Just letting you catch your breath."

 

"Good."  Tara gave a lopsided smile.  “’Cause I like you taking my breath away."

 

Buffy smiled as she moved to straddle Tara's hips.  She gave Tara a quick peck on the lips, and then sat up.

 

Tara trailed her hands up Buffy's thighs to her hips.  She sat up and took Buffy's lips again.  Kissing her deeply, she wrapped her arms around Buffy, pulling her back down to the bed on top of her.  Buffy moaned as Tara ran her hands up and down her back to her butt, where she squeezed the firm flesh.

 

Buffy moaned again, her hips pressing into Tara.  She broke the kiss and moaned.  "Oh, God, Tara!"  She whimpered and hungrily kissed her again.

 

Moaning, Tara’s hips rose up to press into Buffy as she squeezed Buffy's ass and pulled her tighter to her.

 

Buffy whimpered again as she pressed her hips down into Tara.  She ended the kiss slowly, kissing her way down Tara's neck.

 

Tara rubbed Buffy's ass, she then moved her hands up to rub her back.  Tara felt the tears run down her neck as Buffy buried her face there.  She pulled her head back and kissed Buffy's forehead.  Tara rested her cheek on Buffy's head, whispering in her ear as she hugged her tight in comfort.  "I've got you, Baby."  She kissed her head.  "I've got you."  Tara smiled a small smile, she knew what was coming.  "I've got you, Baby."  She kissed Buffy's ear.  "Let it out, Baby.  Let go."

 

A sob broke from Buffy as she grabbed the shoulders of Tara's sweatshirt in her fists.  She was trying to fight it, but the emotions were too much.  She took a shuddering breath, the floodgates opening with an anguished wail.  Buffy was feeling things she hadn't felt for a very long time, the emotions were overwhelming.

 

Tara knew that when Buffy's emotions came back to her, it would be explosive.  Right now she did the only thing she could for the Slayer, she held her.  Tara held Buffy, rubbing her back and letting her know she was there for her.  Kissing her head and murmuring in her ear, occasionally crying along with her.

 

Buffy started to calm down, or so she thought.

 

Tara kissed Buffy's ear and whispered.  "Welcome back, Buffy Summers.  I'm glad you're finally home."

 

Buffy let out another sob.

 

Tara kissed her temple and rubbed her back, down to her ass and back a few times, she then hugged her tight.

 

Buffy started crying again.  When she calmed down again, she started to hiccup.

 

With a smile on her face, Tara pulled her head back to look at Buffy.  Tara's smile grew at the sight of Buffy.  She had to bite her lip to keep from chuckling.

 

Buffy looked at Tara with tears in her eyes, pouting lower lip that trembled, and hiccupped again.

 

Tara chuckled.  "Goddess, you're adorable."  She brought a hand around to trace Buffy's lower lip with a fingertip.  She moved her eyes from Buffy's lip to her eyes as she brought her hand up to wipe away Buffy's tears.  Brushing her knuckles lightly across one cheek, down to trace her jaw line, she cupped Buffy's cheek.  She used her thumb to trace Buffy's lip, slowly leaning forward to bring her lips to Buffy's.  Her lips had no sooner touched Buffy's, when Buffy hiccupped again.  Tara started laughing against Buffy's lips.

 

Buffy hiccupped and groaned.  She buried her face in Tara's neck again as she got bounced around on Tara's chest as she laughed.

 

Tara ran her fingers through Buffy's hair.  She calmed her laughter down as Buffy kept hiccupping.  "You okay?"  She kissed Buffy's head when she nodded.  "Want some water?"

 

Buffy shook her head no, and hiccupped.

 

Tara listened to Buffy hiccup for a couple of minutes.  Then she smirked.  "Take your clothes off."

 

Buffy sucked in a breath.

 

Tara started to giggle, she pulled back to look at Buffy.  "Did I scare you?"

 

Buffy, eyes were wide open with brows buried, narrowed her eyes at Tara.  "Ha- (hiccup) ha."  She pouted.  "And no, it didn't work."

 

Tara pouted.  "Can't blame a girl for trying."  She gave a lopsided smile.

 

Buffy hiccupped and smiled.  "Nope, can't blame you for trying."  She kissed Tara, and snuggled back into her.  "Can blame you for not trying hard enough, though."

 

Tara pulled her head back to look at Buffy's grin.  "I was taking it slow."  She winked and kissed Buffy.

 

Faster than Buffy would have believed possible, she was on her back looking up at Tara.  Buffy chuckled at the look on Tara's face.  "I think you're more surprised than I am."  Buffy leaned up and kissed Tara.  She wrapped her legs around Tara's thighs and pulled her closer.

 

Tara lowered herself down onto Buffy, leaning her weight on her elbows.  "I don't know how I did that?"  Tara smiled at Buffy.

 

Buffy brought her hands to Tara's face, and brushed the hair behind her ears.  "I don't either.  But I'll never underestimate you again."  Buffy brought her lips to Tara's and kissed her softly.  "I think you cured me."  She smiled at Tara, tracing her fingers along her cheek bones, down along her jaw.  "Kiss me."

 

"My pleasure."  Tara slowly lowered her lips to Buffy's.  She started with soft little kisses.  Then she kissed Buffy's upper lip, lower lip, back and forth.  She traced Buffy's lips with her tongue. Buffy parted her lips, but Tara just kept toying with her, building the anticipation.

 

"You're driving me crazy."  Buffy moaned as she wrapped her arms around Tara's neck, pulling her closer.

 

"We can't have that happen."  Tara kissed Buffy deeply.  Tara broke away with little kisses.  "Goddess, you take my breath away."

 

"You're the one doing the kissing."   Buffy panted.  "And doing it quite well, I might add."

 

Tara gave a lopsided smile.

 

"God, I love that smile."  Buffy looked up into Tara's eyes.  "Do you realize how sexy and seductive that smile is?"

 

Tara blushed and shook her head.

 

"Trust me, it is."  Buffy brought a hand forward to trace Tara's lips.  "I always thought so."

 

Tara's eyes opened wide in surprise at the admission from the Slayer.

 

"It sent chills up my spine when you smiled like that."  Buffy moaned when Tara nipped her finger and sucked it into her mouth.  "God, you're beautiful."  Buffy stared at Tara's mouth that still held her finger captive.  She slowly pulled her finger back, moaning when Tara sucked it back in.  She did it a few more times, and then pulled her finger out, attacking Tara's mouth with her own.

 

Tara adjusted her arms so she could press further into Buffy.  Buffy moaned, and Tara broke the kiss panting.  "I'm not too heavy, am I?"

 

"No, you feel good."  Buffy rubbed her hands up and down Tara's back.  "Really good."  Buffy kissed Tara again.

 

Tara shivered and moaned when Buffy ran her hands up under her sweatshirt.

 

Buffy smiled into the kiss as she trailed her nails up and down Tara's back, Tara arching into her with another moan.  Buffy repeated the move.

 

Tara broke the kiss, arched her back and pressed her hips into Buffy.

 

It was Buffy's turn to moan as Tara smiled.  Buffy pressed her hips up into Tara, and pulled her back down to her lips.  The kiss was deep and hungry.  Buffy pulled Tara fully down on top of her.  They both moaned at the full contact.

 

After kissing passionately for a few moments, Tara pulled back panting.

 

"You okay?"  Buffy was breathing heavily herself.

 

Tara nodded.  "Nothing a little oxygen won't cure."  She smiled as she panted.

 

Buffy grinned.  "Need mouth to mouth?"

 

Tara chuckled.  "I think that's what put me in this condition."  She kissed Buffy on the nose.

 

Buffy grinned again.  "Oops!  My bad."

 

"No, you good."  Tara leaned down for another long kiss.  Tara broke the kiss again, this time she trailed kisses down Buffy's jaw to her neck.  She had Buffy moaning and pushing her hips up into her as she nipped and licked at her pulse point.  Tara gently bit Buffy, and sucked at her pulse.

 

Buffy moaned and pulled Tara tighter against her.  Running her hands down to Tara's ass, she squeezed and pulled Tara down as she ground her hips upward.

 

They both moaned.  Tara worked her way back to Buffy's lips.  She nipped a few times then she plunged her tongue into Buffy's mouth for a passionate kiss.

 

Buffy squeezed Tara's ass and pulled her tightly against her, hooking her legs around Tara keeping her there.  She ran her hands up Tara's back, over her shoulders, and lightly rested them on the sides of Tara's face.

 

Tara kissed each of Buffy's palms when they broke their kiss.  She looked into Buffy's eyes, watching the different emotions pass.

 

Buffy lowered her eyes and unhooked her legs from around Tara's thighs.

 

"What is it, Baby?"  Tara rested her forehead against Buffy's.

 

Buffy shook her head as a tear slipped from her eye. 

 

Tara watched the tear start down Buffy's cheek.  She moved her head and kissed the tear away.  Then she kissed Buffy's lips.  She slowly moved off to the side of Buffy, and lay on her side.  She pulled Buffy onto her side to face her.  Tara tried looking in her eyes again, but Buffy wouldn't look at her.  "Are you okay?"

 

Buffy shook her head and shrugged as tears started to fall again.

 

Tara wiped away a few tears, and kissed Buffy's forehead.  She rolled to her back, pulling Buffy with her against her side.  "Shh."  She held Buffy tight and kissed her head again, resting her cheek there.  She rubbed Buffy's back.  "Want to talk about what's going through that pretty head of yours?"  She felt Buffy stiffen momentarily.  "You don't have to, Baby."  She kissed her head.  "I'm here if you want, though."

 

Buffy nodded and snuggled into Tara.  "I'm sorry.  My mind is spinning all over the place."

 

"Anything I can help with?"  Tara kissed her head.  "Pick a place to start?"

 

Buffy chuckled.  "Well, to start with."  Buffy paused.

 

Tara squeezed her and kissed her head.

 

"I really wanted you to make love to me."  Buffy buried her head.

 

Tara kissed her head again.  "You know, the thought had crossed my mind a couple times."  Tara kissed her again.  "But?"

 

"But, I didn't know if you would want to, with me?  Especially since I..."  Buffy wasn't sure she could finish.  "Since I was with..."

 

"Shh."  Tara hugged Buffy tight, kissing her head.  "You having been with Spike, wouldn't have anything to do with me making love with you."  Tara rubbed her back.  "You needed something, and he was there for you."  Tara kissed her head.  "For that, I am grateful to him."  Tara hugged her tight.  "But I could hurt him for the way he did it, and for hurting you."  Tara tilted her head back to look at Buffy.  "Making love with you is something I would very much enjoy, and look forward to doing."  She gently kissed Buffy's lips.  "But I don't think now is the right time for that."  She smiled.  "There are too many things going on up here."  She tapped Buffy's forehead with a finger.  "When we do make love."  She winked.  "I want everything to be for the right reasons.  Not just for the sex."  She kissed Buffy.  "I want both of us to be ready and in the right frame of mind for it.  I want it to be special.  And I want it to mean something."  She looked deeply into Buffy's eyes.  "I won't make love to you because it's something you need at the time.  But I will make love to you because it's something we both want.  But when the time is right, if it's what we both want to happen, then you just try stopping me."  Tara winked again and kissed Buffy.

 

Buffy smiled up at Tara, as a tear fell down her cheek.

 

Tara wiped the tear from Buffy's cheek.  "I love you, you know that.  But I could so easily fall in love with you."  Tara kissed Buffy's lips ever so gently.  "So if this isn't going to mean anything to you, please don't do it."  Tara kissed her again.  "I don't think I could survive that."  Her breath hitched and a tear rolled down Tara's cheek.

 

Buffy shook her head.  "I wouldn't do that to you.  I hope you know that, although it's exactly what I did do with Spike.  I can understand why you'd think that."  Buffy frowned and tears fell from her eyes.  "But never to you."  Buffy started to pull away.

 

Tara held her firmly in place.  "I know that.  I'm sorry, I just had to make sure, and let you know how I felt.  I'm sorry."  She kissed Buffy's head, and rubbed her back.

 

Buffy nodded and snuggled in close again.  "I'm sorry you had doubts."

 

"I don't want either one of us to have doubts, Baby."  Tara kissed her head.  "I would really like there to be an ‘us’.  I want to give us a try."

 

"I don't either."  Buffy kissed Tara's neck.  "Doubts, that is."  She kissed her again.  "And I'd like to try for an ‘us’, too."  She hugged Tara tight.  "You're my lifeline."

 

"I'll be here for you either way.  I won't let you drown, if I can help it.  I'll be here."  Tara kissed Buffy's head.

 

"Thank you."  Buffy kissed Tara's neck again.

 

Tara rubbed Buffy's back.  "Think you can sleep now, Baby?"

 

Buffy stiffened slightly.

 

"Shh."  Tara kissed Buffy's forehead.  "I'm right here."  She hugged Buffy tight.  "Let me hold you, I'll keep you safe tonight.  I promise."

 

"I haven't been sleeping well, since I've been back."  Buffy whispered quietly.

 

"I know you haven't, Baby.  Maybe my holding you will help."  Tara rubbed up and down Buffy's back, kissed her head, and rested her cheek there.

 

Buffy nodded.  "Thank you, for everything, Tara."  Buffy kissed her neck.

 

"You're welcome, Baby."  She brought one hand up to run through Buffy's hair.  "Do you have to be anywhere tomorrow, or rather, today?"

 

Buffy shook her head.  "Dawn's at Janice's for the day.  Knowing her, she'll try to stay there tonight too."

 

"So you can sleep as late as you can.  I don't have anything planned for today either."  She kissed Buffy's head.  "Night, Baby.  Sweet dreams."  She kept running her fingers through Buffy's hair, and massaging her head.

 

Buffy moaned.  "That's nice.  'Night, Tara."  She kissed Tara's neck and snuggled in close.

 

Tara smiled when Buffy fell asleep less than a minute later.  She kept up her comforting gestures for about ten minutes, until she started to drift off.  She moved her hand back down to rubbing Buffy's back, and whispered.  "I'll be here for you.  Love you, Baby."  She kissed Buffy's head one last time.  She could have sworn she heard Buffy mumble just before she dropped off to sleep with a smile on her face.  "Love you, too." 

 

~HLM~

 

Tara woke to Buffy thrashing and moaning in her arms.  "Shh."  Tara hugged her with one arm, rubbing her back with the other hand.  "I've got you, Baby.  You're okay.  Shh.  It's just a dream.  I've got you."

 

Buffy suddenly broke out of Tara's arms, sitting up quickly, gulping in breaths.

 

"Easy, Baby.  You're okay."  Tara rubbed her back and squeezed one hand.  "It was just a dream, Baby.  You're alright."  Tara sat up slowly, and pulled Buffy into her arms.  "You're okay."  Tara watched as Buffy looked down at her hands.  She now knew what the dream was about, and it broke her heart.  Tara pulled Buffy back down onto the bed with her.

 

Buffy was still breathing heavy, and shaking slightly.  "I'm sorry."

 

"Shh."  Tara kissed her head and pulled her closer.  "Are you okay, Baby?"  She rubbed Buffy's back, and ran a hand through her hair.

 

"Yeah."  Buffy wrapped an arm around Tara.

 

Tara kissed her head, and rested her head there.  "How often does that happen, you waking that way?"

 

Buffy stiffened slightly, but didn't answer.

 

"That often, huh?"  Tara hugged her tight, and squeezed her eyes shut.

 

Buffy nodded slowly and whispered.  "Every day."

 

Tara's breath hitched.  "Oh, Goddess."  Tears fell from Tara's eyes and a sob escaped her as she held Buffy close.  "We put you through Hell, Baby."

 

"Don't, Tara."  Buffy shifted to look up at Tara.  "Please don't blame yourself, you didn't know."

 

"But we should have, Baby."  Tara shook her head.  "We were stupid."  Tara closed her eyes and groaned, while shaking her head again.  "We didn't even bring a shovel."

 

Buffy chuckled.  "Okay.  That one I can't argue with."  She kissed Tara when she opened her eyes.  "Not one of the best laid Scoobie plans."

 

"It breaks my heart we put you through that, Baby."  Tara looked sadly up at Buffy.

 

Buffy kissed Tara's chest over her heart.  Then lay her head there.  "I know it does."  She yawned as Tara started massaging her head and neck.  "Mmm.  Gonna put me to sleep."

 

"Aside from the waking up part sucking, is that a bad thing?"  Tara kept running her fingers through Buffy's hair, massaging as she went.

 

Buffy shook her head slightly.  "Not here."

 

"Then get some more sleep.  We'll work on the waking up part, okay?"

 

"'Kay."

 

Tara smiled.  "Sweet dreams, Baby.  Love you."

 

"Mmm.  Love you."  Buffy mumbled.

 

Tara kept up her head massage until she drifted off herself.

 

~HLM~

 

Tara awoke with a weight on her.  Sometime during the morning, Buffy had ended up moving on top of her.  She smiled and started massaging Buffy's head again, surprised she was still sleeping.

 

"Mmm."  Buffy snuggled in closer.

 

Tara's smile grew wider.  Then she almost chuckled, thinking who needs a blanket when you've got a Slayer.  She leaned to kiss Buffy's head.  Tara could tell by Buffy's breathing she was waking up.  She continued massaging hoping this time would be easier on Buffy.

 

"Mmm."  Buffy tried burying her head further into the pillow, which was actually Tara's chest.

 

Tara chuckled.  "Hey, Baby."

 

"Mmm.  Bed's moving."  Buffy snuggled in closer.  "’Mornin'."

 

"Good afternoon."  Tara kissed her head and rubbed her back.

 

Buffy lifted her head and looked at the clock.  "Huh."  Then she snuggled down again.

 

"Comfy?"  Tara massaged Buffy's head.

 

"Mmm.  And warm."  Buffy nodded.

 

Tara chuckled.  "Don't need a blanket, when I've got a Slayer around."

 

"Mattress is moving again."

 

"Your mattress is gonna have to move down the hall soon."

 

"No.  Comfy."  Buffy shook her head.

 

"Would you still be comfy if you were wet?"  Tara smiled.

 

"You win."  Buffy raised her head and kissed Tara, she moved off to the side.

 

"Thank you, Baby."  Tara kissed Buffy's head.  Then she climbed out of bed, grabbed her toiletries bag and towel, and headed for the door.  "Be back in a couple minutes."

 

"'Kay."  Buffy snuggled into Tara's pillow.

 

Tara smiled as she walked out the door.

 

Buffy took a deep breath and smiled.  She buried her nose in Tara's pillow and inhaled again.  She still had a smile on her face when Tara came in the door.

 

Tara looked at Buffy and smiled.  She was still snuggled into her pillow with a smile on her face.  Setting her bag down on the desk, she crawled up the bed and lay beside Buffy, leaned forward and kissed her.  "Hi."

 

Buffy smiled and opened her eyes.  "Hi."  She licked her lips.  "Mmm.  You taste good."

 

Tara raised a brow.  "Oh, really?"

 

Buffy narrowed her eyes, trying to figure out what Tara meant.

 

Tara smirked.

 

Buffy eyes flew open, she then giggled.  "Probably."  She kissed Tara and rolled over backwards off the bed as Tara chuckled.  "My turn to brush my teeth."  She smiled at Tara.  "With my very own toothbrush."

 

Tara chuckled again and hugged her pillow.

 

Buffy grabbed the towel she used last night and picked up her toothbrush.  She turned to Tara as she pointed to her toiletries bag.  "Can I?"

 

Tara rolled her eyes and smiled.  "That was a given, Baby.  You don't have to ask."

 

"It was the polite thing to do."

 

Tara smiled and crooked her finger for Buffy to come to her.  Tara grabbed the front of Buffy's shirt and pulled her down.  She gave her a kiss.  "Yes it was the polite thing to do."  She kissed her again.  "For future reference, you don't have to ask.  You can borrow or use anything."  She kissed her a third time.  "Okay?"

 

Buffy nodded.  "'Kay."  She kissed Tara.  "I'll be right back."  One more kiss and Buffy got up heading for the door.

 

Tara hugged her pillow.  "I'll be here."

 

"That's of the good."  Buffy smiled as she walked out the door.

 

"So it seems."  Tara whispered as she snuggled into her pillow with a smile.

 

Buffy came back minutes later with a smile on her face.  She set the things on the desk and hung her towel back on the rack.  She turned around and jumped on the bed next to Tara.  "Honey, I'm home."  She leaned forward and kissed a chuckling Tara.

 

"I would have never guessed."  Tara smiled and ran her fingers through Buffy's hair, damp around the edges.

 

Buffy closed her eyes and leaned into the touch.  "Trying to put me back to sleep?"

 

Tara scratched her scalp.  "No.  But you can sleep if you want to."

 

"Mmm.  That feels good."  Buffy smiled.

 

"That's why I was doing it."  Tara smiled.  "Although it does seem to be a guaranteed way to put the Summers women to sleep."

 

"That's true."  Buffy smiled.  A couple minutes later, she opened her eyes and looked at Tara.

 

Tara winked with a smile and continued massaging.

 

Buffy smiled.  "Are you hungry?  I can go get bagels, or anything you want?"

 

Tara wiggled her brows and lowered her voice an octave.  "Anything I want?"  She gave a seductive smile.

 

Buffy blushed.  "Umm. Food."  Buffy sputtered.  "Food was the question."

 

Tara chuckled.  "I know, but I like that shade of red on you.  Besides you did say anything I want."  Tara wiggled her brows again and kissed Buffy.

 

"Stop that."  Buffy blushed again.

 

Tara chuckled and brushed Buffy's cheek with the back of her fingers.

 

"Are you gonna answer the question?"

 

Tara winked.  "How 'bout you go home?"

 

Buffy lowered he eyes.

 

Tara put a finger under Buffy's chin, she raised her face up.  "And..."  She looked into Buffy's eyes.  "Take a shower, and check on Dawn."  Tara smiled.  "You could shower here, but I don't have any clothes that would fit you."  She leaned forward and kissed Buffy.  "I'll take a shower, and I can either pick up the bagels or meet you somewhere to eat."  Tara leaned forward and kissed Buffy.  "I'm not kicking you out, Baby."  She kissed her again.  "So what'll it be?"

 

"I can pick them up, so you don't have to go out?"

 

Tara looked out the window then looked back to Buffy.  "What if I meet you at The Espresso Pump?  It's nice outside.  We can go eat in the park?"  Tara kissed Buffy.  "We can come back here later.  I'm not trying to get rid of you, Baby, furthest thing from my mind."

 

"Okay."  Buffy bit her lip.

 

"What is it, Baby?"  Tara ran her fingers through Buffy's hair again.

 

Buffy picked at the pillow.  "If?"  Buffy lowered her eyes to watch her fingers.

 

Tara covered Buffy's fingers and kissed her forehead.  "If?"

 

"If Dawn decides to stay at Janice's tonight… can I stay here?"  Buffy's eyes darted between Tara's eyes and their hands.

 

Tara kissed Buffy's forehead, she then waited for Buffy to look at her.  "I would very much like it if you stayed here tonight."  She kissed Buffy's lips.  "So bring spare clothes with you, if she does stay over."  She kissed Buffy again.  "Then again, bring spare clothes anyway."

 

Buffy raised a brow.

 

"For those ‘just in case’ times you're here."  Tara winked and kissed Buffy again.  "How 'bout we get moving."  Tara whispered against Buffy's lips.  "I'm getting hungry."  She deepened the kiss.

 

Buffy moaned into the kiss.  "Mmm.  Hungry."  She moved closer to Tara, heating up the kiss.  She pulled back chuckling when Tara's stomach growled.  "Food?"

 

"Food."  Tara nodded with a smile.  "More kisses later."  She gave Buffy another peck on the lips.

 

"Can't wait for dessert."  Buffy kissed Tara and grinned.  "Let's get moving."  She gave her one last kiss and rolled off the bed.

 

"Dessert, huh?"  Tara wiggled her brows, gave a lopsided smile, and raked her eyes up and down Buffy's body.

 

Buffy shivered and blushed.  "Stop that, and let's go.  Food, remember?"

 

Tara winked at her and chuckled.  "Oh, I remember."  She got off the bed and kissed Buffy on her way to the closet.

 

Buffy grabbed her pile of clothes and headed for the door.  "I'm gonna go change."

 

Tara looked over her shoulder with a lopsided smile.  "You can change here."  She winked at Buffy.

 

Buffy blushed again.  "Stop that."

 

Tara chuckled.  "But you're adorable when you blush."

 

"Yeah, yeah."  Buffy opened the door and stepped out s she listened to Tara chuckle.

 

Tara had just finished making the bed when Buffy walked back in the room.  She took the sweats from Buffy and tossed them on the bed.  "Ready to go?"

 

Buffy nodded.  "Meet you at The Pump in half an hour?"

 

Tara looked at the clock as she stepped over to Buffy, and wrapped her arms around her waist.  "Make it 45 minutes, so you don't have to rush."  She leaned down and kissed Buffy.

 

Buffy wrapped her arms around Tara's neck.  "45 minutes."  She pulled Tara back down and deepened the kiss.

 

Tara moaned and pulled Buffy tighter against her.

 

Buffy broke the kiss when Tara's stomach growled again.  "Hungry?"

 

"Oh, I'm hungry alright."  Tara hungrily kissed Buffy again.

 

Buffy moaned and pressed further into Tara.

 

They broke apart panting.  Tara leaned her forehead against Buffy's.  "Cold shower."

 

Buffy chuckled.  "Definitely a cold shower."  She kissed Tara again.  "Food."  She stepped back from Tara and looked at the clock.  "I'll see you in 45 minutes."

 

Tara leaned for another kiss.  "I'll be waiting, Baby."  She pinched Buffy's butt.  "Get going.  I want dessert."  She winked and pushed Buffy towards the door.

 

Buffy shook her head.  "What ever happened to that shy Wiccan I used to know?"  She reached for the doorknob.

 

"She's horny."  Tara mumbled.

 

Buffy opened the door and burst out laughing.  "I heard that."  She turned and winked at a blushing Tara.  She stepped back to Tara, reached up and pulled her down for a kiss.  "You're pretty adorable when you blush, yourself."  She kissed her again.  "See you soon."  She smiled at Tara and stepped out the door.

 

Tara slapped her hands on her face.  "Damn Slayer hearing."

 

Buffy laughed on the other side of the door.  "I heard that, too."

 

Tara opened the door.  "Go.  45 minutes, or I'm starting without you."

 

Buffy turned and walked backwards.  She wiggled her brows.  "Can I watch?"

 

Tara blushed and smacked her forehead.  "Oh, Goddess!  You're killing me, Baby!"

 

Buffy chuckled and winked.  "I'm going, I'm going."  She turned and ran to the stairs.  "See you in 45."

 

Tara stepped back into her room and fell on the bed.  She scrubbed her face with both hands and looked at the clock.  "Cold shower.  Need a cold shower, now."  She got up and grabbed her things.

 

~HLM~

 

Buffy smiled when she saw Tara sitting on a bench near The Espresso Pump.  Tara had her head tilted back, face raised to the sun, hair falling over the back of the bench.  She took a good look at Tara, as she sat with her long legs stretched out in front of her.  She noticed that Tara had lost weight, but she looked fantastic.  She was wearing a pair of jeans that fit her well.  Not the usual bulky Tara clothes.  She also had on a white button down shirt, with the sleeves rolled up on her forearms.  Buffy never realized just how beautiful Tara was.

 

Buffy stopped and stood looking at Tara for a moment.  She started walking slowly up behind Tara and spoke softly, not wanting to startle her.  "Hey, Beautiful!"  Buffy bent to put her bag beside the bench, and kissed Tara's temple.  "Come here often?"

 

Tara kept her eyes closed as a smile spread across her face.  "Hey, Baby!"  Then she chuckled and looked up at Buffy.  "Is that your usual pick up line?"

 

Buffy smiled and rested her hands on Tara's shoulders.  "I thought the 'Hey, Beautiful' part was pretty good."

 

Tara reached up and squeezed Buffy's hand.  "It was.  But you're gonna have to work on the rest."  Tara winked at Buffy.

 

"I'll do that."  She started massaging Tara's shoulders.  "You want to stay here and watch my bag and I'll run inside, or do you want to come with?"

 

Tara wiggled her brows.

 

"Don't start, you."  Buffy chuckled.

 

Tara gave a lopsided smile.  "I'll wait here, if you don't mind?"

 

"Not at all.  What would you like?"  Buffy smiled down at Tara.

 

"Umm…"  Tara closed her eyes in thought.  "A double chocolate chip muffin and a hot chocolate, please."  Tara opened her eyes and smiled up at Buffy.

 

"Someone have a chocolate craving?"  Buffy raised a brow.

 

"What gave me away?"  Tara chuckled.

 

Buffy smiled.  "I really want to kiss you right now."

 

"And what's stopping you?"  Tara raised a brow.

 

"We're not exactly in a private place."  Buffy looked around.

 

Tara raised her other brow.

 

Buffy looked back to Tara with brows furrowed.  "And with my luck, as soon as I do, there will be a Scoobie standing somewhere nearby with their mouth hanging open."  Buffy squeezed Tara's shoulders.

 

"Oh!"  Tara straightened up on the bench.

 

Buffy pulled Tara back against her.  "I'm sorry.  I just meant..."

 

Tara shook her head and cut Buffy off.  "No.  You're right, Baby.  I wasn't thinking."  She reached up to squeeze Buffy's hand again, and tipped her head to look at her.  "It's okay, Baby.  I don't want them to find out like that either."  Tara smiled and quickly kissed Buffy's hand.  "Go on, we've got a picnic to get to."  Tara squeezed Buffy's hand and released it.

 

Buffy nodded and slowly turned to walk away.

 

"Hey!"  Tara gave Buffy a lopsided smile when she turned.  "That worked better than a cold shower, didn't it?"  She winked.

 

Buffy smiled and nodded.  "Yeah, it did."

 

"You know, chocolate is a miracle cure.  So move that cute butt and get mine."  She smiled at Buffy.

 

Buffy raised a brow and looked over her shoulder at her butt.

 

Tara chuckled and reached out to slap Buffy's ass.  "I'll be the judge of that.  Get moving, Baby."

 

Buffy smiled and walked away.

 

"Yup.  I was right, it is cute."  Tara spoke quietly with a smile.

 

Buffy opened the door as she looked over her shoulder and winked.  "Thanks."

 

Tara chuckled.  "Anytime."

 

~HLM~

 

Buffy smiled as she stepped out the door.  Tara was in the same position she was in when Buffy first saw her earlier.  She walked up behind her again.  "Hey, Beautiful.  I've got chocolate."

 

"Hey, Baby."  Tara laughed and opened her eyes to look at Buffy.  "That's a better line.  This one works."  She winked at Buffy and stood up.

 

"Thanks."  Buffy smiled.  She held out her hand with the bag and Tara's drink.  "I worked on it while I was waiting inside.  If you can take both of those, I'll grab my bag."

 

Tara reached out with a smile.  "I can do that.  Thank you."

 

"Welcome."  Buffy smiled and grabbed her bag.  "Come on, you ready for your chocolate fix?"

 

"Oh yeah, I'm ready."  Tara grinned.  "Did you get marshmallows?"  Tara started towards the park.

 

"You're going for a total sugar rush, aren't ya’?"  Buffy smiled at Tara as she caught up to her.

 

"And that would be a problem, why?"  Tara raised a brow.

 

Buffy rolled her eyes.  "Well, at least we'll be outside you won't be bouncing off the walls."

 

Tara wiggled her brows and bumped shoulders with Buffy.  "Can I bounce off of you?"

 

Buffy stopped in her tracks, and narrowed her eyes at Tara.

 

It took Tara a couple steps to realize Buffy had stopped.  "Oops!"  Tara turned and bit her lip.

 

"How long were you waiting for me to show up?"

 

"Umm… not long, 5 - 10 minutes."  Tara shook her head.

 

Buffy raised a brow and stepped closer to Tara.  "Have you already had a sugar fix?"

 

Tara chuckled.  "No."  She wrapped an arm around Buffy and started walking again.  "PSR."  Tara rubbed Buffy's back before removing her arm from around her.  "Pre Sugar Rush."  She grinned at Buffy.  "Kinda like PMS, only much, much better."  She winked.

 

"And why didn't I know this before I got extra marshmallows?"  Buffy shook her head.

 

Tara chuckled.  "Thank you, Baby."  She smiled at Buffy.  "I promise not to embarrass you.  If it starts getting out of hand, I'll jog around the park a few times."

 

"So that's why you look so good?"  Buffy smiled as she looked Tara up and down.

 

Tara blushed.

 

"You look fantastic, Tara."  Buffy smiled at her.  "I didn't notice until I saw you stretched out on the bench earlier.  I actually stopped in my tracks."  Buffy grinned at her.

 

Tara blushed even more.  She tilted her head to hide behind her hair.  "Thank you."

 

Buffy wished she had a free hand to push Tara’s hair back.  "So, how long have you been jogging?"

 

Tara lifted her head and shook her hair back.  "Since shortly after I left."

 

"Thank you."  Buffy smiled at Tara.

 

Tara raised a brow in question.

 

"I didn't have a free hand to push your hair back.  You're beautiful Tara, don't hide."  Buffy smiled at her.

 

"Habit."  Tara bit her lip.

 

"I know it is."  Buffy bumped shoulders with Tara.  "So how far do you run?"

 

"I'm up to about 5 miles, I think."  Tara shrugged.  "It gave me something to do besides staring at the blank walls of my room."

 

"Wow.  When do you run?"

 

"Mornings mostly.  Sometimes after class, but I always make sure I'm back before dark."  Tara smiled at Buffy.

 

Buffy smiled.  "That's always a wise choice in this town."  Buffy looked around the park.  "Pick your spot?"

 

Tara looked around, not having realized they were at the park.  "How about over there?"  Tara pointed to a nice shade tree off to the side.

 

Buffy nodded.  "Perfect."

 

Buffy dropped her bag and unzipped it.  She pulled out a thin blanket, and smiled at Tara.  "Sun or shade?"

 

Tara smiled.  "Shade to eat."

 

Buffy nodded and set her drink on the ground.  "Good choice."  She spread out the blanket.  "After you, Beautiful."  Buffy reached for her drink.

 

"Thank you, Baby."  Tara smiled and sat down.  She set her drink between her legs and opened the bag.  She raised a brow and looked at Buffy.  "What's in the cup?"

 

Buffy smiled and sat next to Tara.  "Marshmallows."

 

Tara leaned over and kissed Buffy.  "Thank you, Baby."

 

"You're welcome."  Buffy smiled.

 

Tara pulled the cup of marshmallows out.  She then pulled out two of the four muffins and looked in the bag again.  She looked up at Buffy with a smile.  "Someone sugar rushing with me?"

 

Buffy smiled.  "I couldn't let you have all the fun."  Buffy took the lid off her own hot chocolate and reached for the marshmallows.  She took the lid off the marshmallows and grinned at Tara.

 

"Oh, Goddess!"  Tara chuckled.  "That may be too much sugar, Baby."

 

Buffy shrugged.  "I asked for extra marshmallows, I can't help it if the kid behind the counter was a hormonal teen."  She grinned at Tara.

 

Tara chuckled.  "And I'm sure you did nothing to encourage him?"

 

Buffy batted her lashes at Tara.  "Never."  She winked.

 

"Uh huh, just as I thought."  Tara narrowed her eyes.

 

"I was thinking of you."  Buffy said hopefully and batted her lashes again.

 

Tara rolled her eyes.

 

"I was."  Buffy pouted.

 

Tara grabbed a marshmallow and rubbed it on Buffy's lower lip.  Then she leaned forward and licked the sugar off Buffy's lip, sucking it into her mouth.

 

Buffy moaned and leaned into Tara.

 

Tara released Buffy's lip and gave her a deep kiss.  They were both panting when the kiss ended.

 

Buffy smiled and nodded her head.  "I like marshmallows."

 

Tara grinned and grabbed a muffin.  "I thought you would."  She handed Buffy a muffin.

 

They ate, feeding each other on occasion and sharing many kisses along the way.  When they were done they still had a muffin and some marshmallows left over.

 

Tara put the leftovers in the bag and gathered the trash.  "Baby, can you put this in your bag?"  She held out the bag to Buffy.

 

"Sure."  Buffy tucked the bag in her duffle bag and zipped it up.  Tara was kneeling close to her when she turned.  She smiled up at Tara.  "Hey!"

 

Tara leaned down and kissed Buffy.  "I'm gonna go throw the trash away.  Will you move us into the sun, Baby?"

 

Buffy kissed Tara.  "Whatever you want, Beautiful."  Buffy winked.

 

"Hmm."  Tara winked.  "I'll be right back."  She kissed Buffy again and got up.

 

Buffy watched as Tara jogged away towards a trash can.

 

Tara turned around and looked at Buffy.  She stopped and put her hands on her hips.

 

Buffy just grinned and shrugged, she was still sitting where Tara had left her.

 

Tara smiled and shook her head before jogging back to Buffy.

 

Buffy stood as Tara got closer.  "I didn't know where in the sun you wanted to go?"  She grinned at Tara.

 

Tara laughed.  "Nice try, Baby."  She kissed Buffy.  "Want to try again?"  She smiled.

 

"Actually, I was enjoying the view."  Buffy pulled Tara to her.  "It was a magnificent view."  She kissed Tara.  "You really are beautiful, Tara."

 

Tara blushed with a smile.  "Thank you, Baby."  She wrapped her arms around Buffy and kissed her.  When the kiss ended, she slapped Buffy's ass.

 

"Hey!"  Buffy jumped.  "What was that for?"  She pouted.

 

"For not moving the blanket."

 

"But I was distracted by a beautiful woman."  She pulled Tara's head back down for a kiss.  "A very beautiful woman."

 

Tara smiled.  "Good excuse, Baby."  She kissed Buffy's forehead.  "Come on, let's get some sun."  She kissed Buffy again and massaged her butt.

 

Buffy moaned and deepened the kiss.  "Sure you want to move into the sun?"  Buffy kissed Tara again.

 

"As much as I'm enjoying this, I think we could both use a little sunshine, Baby."  Tara kissed Buffy's forehead again and ran her fingers through her hair.

 

Buffy laid her head on Tara's shoulder.  "You are my sunshine."

 

Tara hugged Buffy tight and kissed her head.  "As are you, Baby."

 

Buffy nodded and stepped back.  "Sunshine it is."  She grabbed Tara's hand and led her off the blanket.  "Pick your spot, Beautiful?"

 

"Just out into the sun, Baby."  Tara grabbed a corner of the blanket, as did Buffy.  They moved the blanket away from the shade of the tree.  Tara smiled at Buffy as she lay down.  "Thank you."  She leaned back on her elbows and raised her face to the sun.

 

Buffy kicked off her boots and lay beside Tara.  "You're welcome.  And you're right, this is nice."  Buffy rolled her sleeves up and lay on her back.  "Should have worn shorts and a tank top."  She turned her head, and wiggled her brows at Tara with a smile.

 

Tara chuckled.  "Maybe next time, Baby."

 

"I think you'd look nice in shorts and a tank."  Buffy furrowed her brows.  "You've lost a lot of weight, I'm hoping I know the reason and it's not because you're sick?"

 

Tara reached out and caressed Buffy's cheek with the backs of her fingers.  "I'm not sick, Baby."  Tara gave a small smile.  "I just haven't had much of an appetite since I moved out of the house."

 

Buffy reached up and took Tara's hand.  She gave it a kiss.  "That was my guess.  What ever the reason as long as you're healthy.  You really do look fantastic, Tara."  Buffy smiled and squeezed Tara's hand.

 

"Thank you, Baby."  Tara smiled with a blush.  "I feel good, and I'm getting used to me.  You know what I mean?"

 

"I do."  Buffy smiled.  "You have to get used to people looking at you like a sex object, rather than the shy Wiccan."  Buffy wiggled her brows.

 

Tara blushed and broke out in laughter.  "That is something Tara Maclay will never be."

 

Buffy rolled onto her side and up on her elbow.  She moved closer to Tara.  Buffy reached out and turned Tara's face towards her.  She looked Tara in the eyes as she brushed her cheek.  "Although you have been told otherwise for selfish and controlling reasons.  You, Tara Maclay, are a very beautiful woman, inside and out.  Don't let anyone ever tell you any differently."  Buffy smiled at Tara.  "I always thought you were pretty, but you've definitely come into your own.  You are beautiful."  Buffy leaned forward and kissed Tara.

 

"Thank you."  Tara leaned up and kissed Buffy.  "I believe you, Baby.  Now I just have to get myself to believe it, too."  Tara traced Buffy's lower lip with a fingertip.

 

Buffy kissed Tara's finger.  "You will."

 

Tara smiled and nodded.  "Did you talk to Dawn?"  She ran her fingers through Buffy's hair.

 

Buffy smiled.  "She's staying at Janice's."

 

"Good."  Tara pulled Buffy down for a kiss.  "I'm not ready to let you go just yet."

 

"Neither am I."  Buffy leaned to meet Tara's lips.

 

Tara pulled back panting.  "We're not getting much sun this way."  She smiled and ran her fingers through Buffy's hair.

 

"True.  But I'm not really caring at the moment."  Buffy kissed Tara's wrist.

 

Tara smiled at her.  "I'm not caring either, but we are out in the park, Baby."

 

Buffy looked around then back at Tara.  "You're right."  Buffy kissed Tara again.  Then she gave Tara a smile and lay back down beside her.  "To be continued later."

 

Tara turned her head and winked at Buffy.  "Count on it, Baby."

 

"Do you have homework you're supposed to be doing?"

 

Tara chuckled.  "That was why I was at the library so late last night."  She turned to look at Buffy.  "I finished what I needed to, and even got a bit of a head start on coming assignments."

 

Buffy raised a brow.  "I'm impressed."  Then she furrowed her brows.  "I was always behind."

 

Tara reached out and stroked Buffy's cheek.  "Baby, it's not like I have a job to do every night, or a world to save on a regular basis."  She gave a sad smile.  "I haven't really had much of anything to do at all, except go to classes."

 

Buffy bit her lip.  "I'm sorry."

 

Tara shook her head.  "You've got nothing to be sorry for, Baby.  It was my choice to leave."

 

Buffy nodded.  "It may have been your choice to leave Willow.  But it wasn't your choice to lose everything else, too."  Buffy reached out and wiped away Tara's tear.  "I said you were family once, and I meant that.  What I'm sorry about is that the family lost a member, and we just let you go without realizing it."

 

Tara rolled over and laid her head on Buffy's shoulder.

 

"I'm sorry I was too screwed up to not notice the impact of you leaving."  Buffy wrapped her arms around Tara and kissed her head.  "I have more to say about this, but not here, not now."  She rubbed Tara's back.  "I'm sorry I brought it up out here."  She kissed Tara's head again.

 

Tara shook her head.  "It's okay, Baby, just a tough subject to talk about."  Tara kissed over Buffy's heart and rested her head on her shoulder again.

 

About five minutes later, Buffy kissed Tara's head again.  "Hey, Beautiful, you fall asleep down there."

 

"No, just enjoying laying here."  Tara kissed Buffy's shoulder.

 

"You're gonna look funny with a tan on only one side of your face."  Buffy rubbed Tara's back.

 

"Is that your way of telling me to get off you?"  Tara smiled up at Buffy.

 

"God, no."  Buffy shook her head.  She kissed Tara's forehead.  "I like you right were you are."  She smiled at Tara.  "Just wouldn't want you to end up two-tone."  She leaned down and kissed Tara's lips.

 

"You mean you wouldn't love me if I was two-tone?"  Tara pouted.

 

Buffy smiled.  "Beautiful, I'd love you if you were a zebra."

 

"Good answer, Baby."  Tara leaned up and kissed Buffy.  Then she sat up.  "Put your boots on, Baby.  We'll drop your stuff off at the campus then find something to do."  Tara pulled Buffy to a sitting position.

 

Buffy nodded and reached for her boots.  "Sounds good to me."

 

Tara stood and held out a hand to help Buffy up.

 

"Thanks, Beautiful."  Buffy smiled and squeezed Tara's hand.

 

"You're welcome, Baby."  Tara smiled and reached for a corner of the blanket.

 

They folded the blanket, grabbed Buffy's bag, and headed back towards campus.

 

Tara reached out and took Buffy's hand, entwining their fingers.

 

Buffy smiled and squeezed Tara's hand.

 

"When do you have to go to work, Baby?"

 

Buffy groaned.  "Which job?"

 

"Well, I know The Slayer goes out at sunset."  Tara smiled at Buffy.  "But, I was referring to the other job you hate?"

 

"Ah, yes.  Smelly job number two."  Buffy frowned.  "I really, really hate that job."

 

Tara squeezed her hand and kissed her head.  "I know you do, Baby."

 

"I don't have to be there again until Monday."  Buffy pouted.

 

Tara stopped and pulled Buffy into a one armed hug.  "We'll find you a better job, Baby."  She kissed Buffy's temple.

 

"I'm not qualified for anything, Tara."  Buffy frowned and started walking again.  "I barely made it out of high school, both literally and figuratively.  The only reason I made it into UCS is because I did pretty good on the SATs."  Buffy shook her head.  "I think I'm the first Slayer to survive long enough, having died twice, to have to get a job."

 

"It's not fair, Baby."  Tara squeezed Buffy's hand.  "I never understood how they could pay The Watchers, but not The Slayers."

 

"Easy."  Buffy shook her head.  "They're assholes."

 

Tara smiled at Buffy.  "That goes without saying, Baby."

 

"Sorry.  I just never liked The Counsil."  Buffy grumbled.

 

"Can't say that I blame you, Baby."  Tara opened the dorm door.  "I didn't like what I saw or heard of them, myself."

 

Tara released Buffy's hand with a squeeze at her door.  She unlocked the door and let Buffy go in first.  She followed Buffy in and shut the door.  Tara wrapped her arms around Buffy from behind as she stood from setting her bag on the floor.  "I'm sorry I brought up a sore subject for you, Baby."  Tara kissed Buffy's temple when she leaned back into her.

 

Buffy wrapped her arms around Tara's.  "It's okay.  We seem to be pressing each others buttons."  Buffy moaned as Tara started nipping and kissing her neck.  "Although you seem to be making up for it quite nicely."  Buffy reached behind her, putting her hands on the backs of Tara's thighs, pulling her closer.  Buffy stretched her neck out so Tara had more of it to explore.

 

Tara answered Buffy's silent request by exploring more of her neck.  She pressed herself tighter against Buffy's back, her hands started to roam over Buffy's stomach and sides.  Tara worked her way up Buffy's neck to her ear.  She kissed just below and behind Buffy's ear, and then worked her way to Buffy's earlobe.  She nipped it and sucked it into her mouth.

 

Buffy moaned and moved her hands forward to cover Tara's.  She covered Tara's hands with her own and guided them to her breasts.

 

They both moaned when Tara gently squeezed Buffy's nipples between her fingers as she squeezed her breasts.  Tara ran her tongue around the edge of Buffy's ear and back down to her earlobe.

 

Buffy reach up with one hand to the back of Tara's head.  She turned her head and brought Tara's lips to hers, moaning as Tara's tongue entered her mouth.  With the hand still over Tara's on her breast, she guided Tara's hand down her abdomen to cup her between her legs.

 

Tara moaned as she pressed into Buffy's ass, while rubbing along the seam of Buffy's jeans between her legs.

 

Buffy moaned and broke the kiss panting.  "Mmm… Tara."  Buffy's legs started shaking.  "I'm not gonna be able to stand up much longer."  She leaned back into Tara.

 

"I've got you, Baby."  Tara started unbuttoning Buffy's shirt as she kissed her neck.  "Kick off your boots, Baby."

 

"I'll can't, I'll fall."  Buffy moaned.

 

"I won't let you fall, Baby."  Tara nipped at Buffy's neck.  "I'll help."  Tara moved her foot to the back of Buffy's foot.  She placed her foot against the back of Buffy's boot.  "Right foot, Baby."

 

Buffy managed to get her right boot off.  They repeated the process for the left boot.  Then Tara kicked off her own sneakers.

 

Tara moved her hands to Buffy's hips.  "Turn around, Baby."  Tara guided Buffy around and pulled her tightly against herself as she met Buffy's lips with her own.  She walked Buffy backwards towards the bed.  "Lay down, Baby."  Tara followed Buffy down onto the bed.  She crawled with her as Buffy moved up the bed, never breaking the kiss.  Tara pressed a leg between Buffy's.

 

Buffy moaned and pressed her hips up into Tara.

 

Tara bent her leg to press further into Buffy, giving her more pressure where she wanted it most.

 

Buffy moaned and arched into Tara.  She broke the kiss and cupped Tara's face.  "Tara, please."

 

"Please what, Baby?"  Tara kissed Buffy's palms.

 

Buffy whimpered looking into Tara's eyes.  She saw nothing but love and desire in those blue eyes.  "I Love you, Tara."  She pulled Tara down for a gentle kiss.  "Please, make love to me."

 

Tara wiped a tear from Buffy's temple.  "Are you sure, Baby?"  Tara locked eyes with Buffy.

 

"Please."  Buffy traced Tara's lower lip.  "I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

 

Tara kissed Buffy's finger.  "I love you, Baby."  She leaned down and kissed Buffy before she pulled back.  "Sit up, Baby."  She sat up and pulled Buffy with her.  She looked into Buffy's eyes as she finished unbuttoning Buffy's shirt.  "If you want me to stop, you tell me.  If there's something I do that you don't like, you tell me."  She smiled at Buffy.  "If I do something you like, you can tell me that, too."  Tara winked.

 

Buffy smiled nervously.  "I umm…"  She looked down and back up to Tara.  "I've never been…"

 

Tara raised a surprised brow, and stilled her hands from pushing Buffy's blouse off her shoulders.  "I thought..."  She tilted her head.  "Faith?"

 

Buffy shook her head.  "No."  She gave a small chuckle.  "Not that she didn't try numerous times."

 

Tara's hands fell from Buffy's shoulders, her brows furrowed.

 

Buffy grabbed Tara's hands and squeezed gently.  "What?"

 

"She..."  Tara shook her head.

 

"She what, Tara?"  Buffy squeezed Tara's hands gently.

 

"S-S-She."  She shook her head again and looked down at their hands.  She looked back up at Buffy.  "W-When she had taken W-W-Willow, she told W-Wil that you h-had been together."  Tara squeezed Buffy's hands.  "I think that was part of the r-reason W-Willow h-hated her so much."

 

"Willow never said anything to me."  Buffy frowned.

 

Tara reached up and smoothed the frown from Buffy's brows.  "She f-figured if you w-wanted her to know, you'd t-tell her."

 

Buffy looked down, released Tara's hand and pulled her shirt closed.

 

"B-Baby?"  Tara put her hand on Buffy's arm.

 

Buffy kept her head down and shook her head.

 

Tara looked at the door when someone knocked.  "Please, Baby?"

 

"Answer the door, Tara."  Buffy started buttoning her shirt, never looking up.

 

"Tell me?"  Tara squeezed Buffy's arm.

 

Someone knocked on the door again.

 

Buffy looked up with tears in her eyes and called out.  "Just a minute."

 

Tara dropped her hand with a hurt look as her shoulders slumped.

 

"Answer the door."  Buffy looked down and finished buttoning her shirt.

 

Tara bowed her head, slowly climbed off of Buffy and the bed.

 

Buffy lay back down and turned on her side, facing away from Tara.

 

Tara wrapped her arms around herself as a tear fell.  She wiped the tear away as she turned to the door.  She took a deep breath, with one last look to Buffy, she opened the door.  "Kim?"

 

"Hi, Tara.  Can I borrow your History notes for a few?"  She narrowed her eyes.  "Are you okay?"

 

Tara nodded.  "Yeah, just let me get the notes for you."  She turned and went to her desk to get her notes.  She looked over her shoulder at Buffy again before she went back to the door, handing the notes to Kim.

 

Kim took the notes and mouthed silently.  "You okay?"

 

Tara nodded with a small smile.

 

Kim nodded and reached out to squeeze Tara's arm.  "I'm just going to make copies.  I'll have them back within ten minutes."  She looked at Buffy on the bed, then back to Tara.  "I'll just leave them against the wall and knock so you'll know they're there."

 

Tara nodded.  "Thanks, Kim."

 

"Thank you, Tara.  I'll see you later."  She squeezed Tara's arm again.

 

Tara nodded and Kim turned away.  Tara closed the door softly, resting her head against it for a moment.  She wrapped her arms around herself as she turned back to Buffy, slowly walked back to the side of the bed and hesitated.

 

Buffy never turned, but reached back with one hand.

 

Tara bit her lip to hold back a sob as her tears fell.  She reached out and took Buffy's offered hand.

 

Buffy pulled Tara onto the bed.

 

Tara climbed on the bed and lay behind Buffy, pushing her arm under Buffy's pillow.

 

Buffy pulled Tara to her and brought her hand to her lips, kissing it softly.  "I'm sorry."  She hugged Tara's hand to her chest.

 

Tara moved closer behind Buffy and curled her other arm around to hug her tight.  She buried her face in Buffy's hair as a soft sob escaped.

 

Buffy pulled away slightly and turned around, pulling Tara into her arms.

 

Tara sobbed again and buried her face in Buffy's shoulder.  "I don't know what I did?"

 

Buffy hugged Tara tightly to her.  "Shh."  She kissed Tara's head.  "I'm sorry.  You didn't do anything, Tara.  I'm sorry, it was my fault."  She kissed Tara's head again.  "I didn't mean to hurt you, Beautiful."   She rubbed Tara's back.  "Old habit, pull back, crawl inside, shut down.  I'm sorry."

 

Tara pulled back from Buffy's shoulder.  They wiped each others tears from their faces.  Tara traced Buffy's face with a finger.  "What happened, Baby?"

 

"I don't know."  Buffy lowered her eyes.

 

Tara tipped Buffy's head up to look in her eyes.  "Baby?"

 

Buffy's eyes watered up.  "I wanted you to make love to me."  She closed her eyes as her tears fell.

 

Tara kissed away the tears.  "Then what happened?"  Tara caressed Buffy's cheek.

 

Buffy opened her eyes and looked at Tara.  "Then it got cold inside."

 

Tara furrowed her brows.

 

"Inside of me.  The coldness came back."  Buffy looked away again.

 

Tara's eyes filled with tears as she caressed Buffy's cheek.  "Baby?"

 

Buffy closed her eyes, looking at Tara when she opened them again.  "We were talking about Willow, you started stuttering.  You hadn't stuttered since I've been here."  Buffy bit her lip.  "I don't know what happened, I turned cold and I just wanted to run."  Tears fell from both their eyes.

 

Tara pulled Buffy to her and held her tight.  She kissed Buffy's temple and whispered in her ear.  "I do want to make love to you, and with you.  I don't want you to be cold inside, or feel you need to run and hide anymore."  She kissed Buffy's temple again.  "I'm sorry about the stutter."  She took a deep breath.  "It's just hard to talk about W-Willow."  She kissed Buffy again.  "She broke my heart, Baby."

 

"I know she did, Tara."  Buffy pulled back, she kissed Tara's lips and pulled her head against her shoulder.  "I know she did."

 

They held each other and onto each other for the next few moments in silence.  There was a soft knock on the door.  "Tara, they’re here.  Thank you."  Kim called softly through the door.

 

"Thanks, Kim."  Buffy called back as she rubbed Tara's back.  "I'll go grab your notes before someone takes them."  She kissed Tara's head.  "Okay?"

 

Tara nodded and pulled back from Buffy.

 

Buffy leaned forward and kissed Tara's lips.  "Be right back."

 

Tara nodded and brushed Buffy's cheek.

 

Buffy smiled.  "While I'm up, I'm gonna run down the hall."

 

Tara chuckled.  "Go on."  She kissed Buffy and rolled away from her.

 

Buffy kissed Tara as she climbed over her.  "Be right back."  She jumped out of the bed and went to the door.  She picked up Tara's notebook and set it on the desk.  She winked at Tara and closed the door.  "Damn."

 

Tara chuckled.  "I'll get it, Baby."

 

"Thanks."  Buffy called back.

 

Tara smiled and shook her head, staying on the bed for a moment before she got up to unlock the door.  She turned back to the room and stood in the middle of it.  She was looking around the room when Buffy opened the door.

 

Buffy quietly shut the door and walked up behind Tara.  She wrapped her arms around her from behind, and kissed Tara on the shoulder.  "What's going through that head, Beautiful?"

 

"I don't want this room to be barren and cold anymore."  She reached her arms back and put her hands on Buffy's ass.  "I want to live again."  She turned in Buffy's arms.  "I want you to live again."  She wrapped her arms around Buffy's waist as Buffy moved her arms to Tara's shoulders.  "I want 'us' to be a part of the living again."  Tara leaned forward and kissed Buffy.  She leaned her forehead against Buffy's.  "I'm falling in love with you, Elizabeth Anne Summers, and I don't want to stop."

 

Buffy wiped away the tear that rolled down Tara cheek.  "That's good."  Buffy smiled.  "Because I've already fallen for you, Tara 'Beautiful' Maclay, and I have no intention of stopping."  Buffy kissed Tara deeply.

 

"Glad we got that settled."  Tara panted.  She chuckled.  "Thanks for the middle name, I always wanted one."

 

"I wasn't sure what yours was, or if you had one, but I thought that one suited you perfectly."  Buffy smiled.

 

"Thank you.  I don't have one."  Tara smiled.

 

"Now you do."  Buffy kissed Tara again.

 

"Now I do."  Tara kissed the tip of Buffy's nose.  "And now it's my turn to run down the hall."  She kissed Buffy again.

 

Buffy chuckled.  "Don't forget to unlock the door."  She quickly kissed Tara and stepped back.

 

Tara smiled.  "I still have my key in my pocket."  She kissed Buffy.  "Be right back."  She walked to the door and winked at Buffy when she unlocked it.

 

"Smart ass!"  Buffy smiled.

 

Tara laughed and shut the door.

 

Buffy picked up her duffle bag and laid it on the bed.  She opened it up and pulled out the bag with the muffin and marshmallows, she set them on the desk.  Next she pulled out Mr. Gordo.  She smiled and set him on Tara's pillow.  She was pulling out her pants and shirts when Tara walked in.

 

"Moving in?"  Tara smiled when Buffy turned to her.

 

"I'd like to, but we both know I can't."  She shrugged.

 

Tara walked over and hugged her.  "I know, Baby."  She chuckled.  "You brought Mr. Gordo?"

 

"Figured I'd help decorate the place."  Buffy looked at her stuffed pig.  "And he'll keep you company when I'm not here."

 

Tara turned Buffy's face back to her and kissed her.  "Thank you, Baby."

 

"I can't give you the whole family right now, but I can give you part of it."  Buffy smiled sadly.

 

Tara nodded as a tear fell.  "One step at a time, Baby."

 

Buffy wiped away the tear and kissed Tara.  "I love you, Beautiful."

 

"I love you, too, Baby."  Tara hugged Buffy tight.  She pulled away with a kiss.  "Let's put your stuff away.  There are hangers in the closet.  Tara grabbed Buffy's sneakers and went to the closet, grabbed hangers and put her sneakers on the floor.  Buffy was staring at her when she turned around and Tara stood there waiting until Buffy's eyes moved up to hers.  She smirked and raised a brow.

 

Buffy blushed and shrugged.  "You really look good in those jeans."  Then she smirked.  "You'd probably look really good out of those jeans, too."

 

Now it was Tara's turn to blush.  "You'll just have to wait to see."  Tara walked over and kissed Buffy.  "Thank you."

 

"Just calling it like I see it."  Buffy smiled and took a hanger from Tara.  She put a shirt on the hanger and laid it on the bed.

 

Tara helped her put the rest on hangers then picked them all up.  She took them to the closet and hung them up.

 

Buffy carried a bag over and hung it by its string over one of the hangers.

 

Tara raised a brow.

 

"Socks and underwear."  She shrugged.

 

Tara nodded.  "Anything else?"

 

Buffy stuffed the blanket back in the bag.  "Just weapons for patrol."

 

Tara nodded and sat on the bed against the headboard, she picked up Mr. Gordo.

 

Buffy zipped up her bag and set it on the floor by the desk again.  "Speaking of which."  She walked over and climbed onto Tara's lap, setting Mr. Gordo aside.

 

Tara smiled as she wrapped her arms around Buffy.

 

"Will you come with me tonight?"  Buffy kissed Tara.  "It's been quiet lately."

 

"I'd love to."  Tara pulled Buffy closer.  "That way I won't worry so much while you're out there."  She kissed Buffy then she trailed kisses down her neck.  "So what did you have in mind for the meantime?"  She kissed further down Buffy's neck.

 

"I kinda like your idea."  Buffy ran her fingers through Tara's hair, pulling her head closer as she tilted hers back.

 

"Oh, you do, huh?"  Tara trailed her tongue from collarbone to collarbone.

 

"Please."  She sat back a little and cupped Tara's face.  "No talking, no stopping."

 

Tara nodded.

 

Buffy leaned forward.  "I love you, Beautiful."  She kissed Tara deeply and passionately.

 

"I love you, too, Baby."  Tara kissed her way down Buffy's neck again as her hands came around Buffy's sides to the buttons on her shirt.

 

Buffy sat back and covered Tara's hands stopping them.  "One question first."

 

Tara nodded.

 

Buffy smiled.  "Did you lock the door?"

 

Tara chuckled.  "I locked the door, Baby.  If anyone knocks, we're not answering."  She grabbed Buffy's shirt and pulled her forward for a kiss.

 

"Just checking."  Buffy wrapped her arms around Tara's shoulders as Tara worked her way down her neck again.

 

Tara slowly unbuttoned Buffy's shirt and pushed it off her shoulders.  "Take it off, Baby."

 

Buffy moved her arms down so Tara could push her shirt off.

 

Tara kissed Buffy as she pulled the shirt from her pants and tossed it on the floor.  She ran her hands up and down Buffy's back a few times before bringing them forward to cup Buffy's breasts.

 

Buffy ended the kiss with a moan and tilted her head back.

 

Tara kissed along Buffy's neck and collarbones while fondling her breasts.  She looked up at Buffy as she reached for the front clasp of her bra.