DIFFERENT ENDINGS

BY

KINETIC-KID

Rating:             NC-17

Disclaimer: Definitely no money being made.  All characters belong to Joss Whedon and ME.  I own nothing except whatever characters I may make up for this story.

Distribution:     Oh yeah, anywhere, anytime.  Just make sure I get credit and let me know where it is. 

Spoilers:           Pretty much everything up to Season 6 Tabula Rasa then quickly AU.

Feedback:         Please, Please, PLEASE.  I live for feedback.  I get irritable and upset if I don’t get any and I might not continue writing.  Of course, if you don’t like the story and think it sucks you may not want me to continue!

Pairing:            W/T (previously), A/X, B/F/T

Auth Note:        NOT WILLOW FRIENDLY!!  If you are hoping for a W/T get back together fic - forget it!  Not gonna happen!!!  I was pissed after re-watching BTVS on DVD with the way Willow treated Tara and decided she didn’t deserve the sweet Wiccan, hence this story.  Joss wanted Willow to go to the edge?  Here’s a different way for it to happen!!  Everything is un-beta’d - so any and all mistakes are solely mine!  Sorry in advance for any screw-ups.

Summary:         What would happen if after the Tabula Rasa spell when Tara left Willow, Tara decided she wouldn’t be able to trust Willow ever again?  How might things have turned out?

***

Chapter 1

‘How could someone that professed to love me as much as Willow said she did do that to me, not once, but twice?  Was it only twice?  How can I ever trust her again.’ Tara thinks to herself lying on the dorm room bed crying softly.  ‘I can’t ever trust her again.  Oh, Goddess, Willow.  Why?  Why did you do that to me?’

Suddenly there’s a light knocking at the door and Tara looks towards it wondering who would be there.  Other than the Scoobies, she really doesn’t have any friends.  And, unfortunately, they were all Willow’s friends, not hers. 

Tara slowly gets up as the knocking comes again.  “I’m coming.” She heads towards the door as she wipes the tears from her face.  “B-Buffy, what are you d-doing here?”

“May I come in?  Dawn let me know where you were.  I hope you don’t mind.” Buffy asks. 

Tara steps aside and lets Buffy come in.  Tara’s lived long enough on the Hellmouth to know not to invite anyone in.

Buffy half-heartedly smiles at the blonde Wiccan.  “I wanted to see how you were doing.  I haven’t seen you for over a month.  I don’t know what happened between you and Willow, but if you need someone to talk to...” Buffy hesitates looking into the sad blue eyes staring at her.  “I can be there for you, if you want me to.  I‘m sorry, I should have been by here to see you before now.”  Buffy rambles slightly, feeling guilty about not seeking Tara out sooner.

Tara shakes her head slightly and sighs deeply with new tears welling up in her eyes.  “Buffy, W-W-Willow’s your best friend.  I-I can’t expect you to…” Tara slowly trails off as the tears start falling and she starts sobbing.

Buffy slowly reaches over and touches Tara on the shoulder and then gently pulls the blonde to her.  She just holds her quietly, gently rocking her side to side.  Slowly the blonde’s tears subside and she releases the death grip she had on Buffy’s shirt and pulls away, looking into the hazel eyes of the slayer.

“Thank you, Buffy.  B-but I know I’m just…”

Buffy interrupts Tara before she can get any further, knowing what the Wiccan was going to say.  “Tara, you’re family.  I know we don’t know each other that well, which is completely my fault, and all Willow will say is that you left because of the magic.  I know you wouldn’t leave her unless it was something serious.  You love her to much.  I love her too, but sometimes she does stupid stuff without thinking.  Which, God knows, I’m doing the same damn thing.” Buffy says sighing deeply and slowly sinks down on the end of the bed. 

“W-what are you talking about Buffy?” Tara hesitantly questions Buffy while kneeling in front of her gently clasping the slayer’s hands in her own. 

“Tara, you are the kindest, sweetest person I have ever known.  I come here to try and maybe help you feel better and I decide to make comments about my own stupidity.  You don’t deserve that.” Buffy states self-deprecatingly.

“P-please Buffy.  Right now, I need something else to put my f-focus on.  Let me help you, please?” Tara whispers quietly while tilting her head forward so her dark blonde hair hides her face.

“Maybe, if you want, we can help each other out?” Buffy asks hesitantly.  “Be friends, there for each other?  ‘Cause, God knows I need someone to talk to, and so could you, right?”

Tara looks up through her hair at Buffy and kind of gives a small smile.  “I think I would l-like that.”

Buffy smiles down at the blonde.  Then standing, she pulls the blonde Wiccan up at the same time.  “Have you eaten anything today?”

“No, I haven’t been that hungry.” Tara says quietly, looking down at the floor.

“Well, how about I run out, grab us something to eat and bring it back, we can’t have a serious talk without having something in our stomachs, can we?”  Buffy grins, trying to coax a smile from Tara.

Tara glances up with a half-smile on her face.  “Thanks Buffy.  I’m gonna go and clean myself up some.  If you get back before me, just let yourself in, okay?”

Buffy nods to Tara as she leaves.

‘It seems strange Buffy seeking me out.  I wonder what’s going on, besides the whole being brought back from the dead.  Being dragged out of Heaven has to be hard on her.  Maybe that’s what she wants to talk about.  She hasn’t been the same since she came back.  Maybe we can help each other.’ Tara thinks to herself while she grabs her shower kit, a clean set of clothes and heads to the bathroom.

***

Chapter 2

“Thanks Buffy, that was good.” Tara grins at Buffy as they finish up the late lunch/early dinner that Buffy had ran out to get them.

“No thanks necessary, not like I cooked it or anything.  I can guarantee you would definitely not say it was good if I had fixed it!” Buffy smiles looking at Tara, happy that she seems to have calmed down quite a bit from earlier.  “Lord knows I can’t cook for anything.”

“You’re great at what you do, Buffy.  That’s what matters.”  Tara states seriously looking at Buffy.

“Thanks.”  Buffy takes a deep breath exhaling it quietly.  “I guess I could get this ball rolling, huh?”   Buffy leans back against the side of the bed where they had sat on the floor eating.  “How should I start?”

“You could start at the beginning.  I-I-if you want to.” Tara says looking at Buffy with a kind, compassionate look on her face.  “I won’t judge you Buffy.  I-I’m not that type of person.”

“Tara, you don’t have to tell me that.  I know you’re not.  As a matter of fact, that is one of the reasons I came to you to talk.  I know that whatever we discuss, it’s just between us.  You are compassionate and honest to a fault.” Buffy states without a hint of doubt in her voice. 

Buffy proceeds to tell Tara about how, even before her death, she seemed to be losing touch.  That she just didn’t feel the same as before and how it was even worse now, that she had come back.  She slowly opens up about what has been happening between her and Spike, how Spike could hurt her and how they beat each other up as foreplay before having wild, raw sex.  That that was the only time she seemed to feel. She tells her about how she thinks she came back wrong, especially with Spike being able to hurt her.  How angry she was about being dragged out of Heaven.  How angry she was with Willow.  All Willow ever seemed to do was apologize to her for bringing her back, when they talked at all.

By the time Buffy finishes telling Tara about everything, Tara is holding Buffy gently against her and the slayer’s head is buried in the crook of her neck, crying and shaking.

“Let it all out, Buffy.  Just let it all out.” Tara gently strokes Buffy’s hair with one hand while holding her tight with her other arm.  ‘Oh, Goddess.  Buffy, why didn’t you come to me before this?  I would be willing to help you out, in any way I can.’ Tara thinks to herself.  ‘At least she’s here now.  Hopefully I can help her through this.’

As Buffy slowly calms down and her sobs become just an occasional hiccup, she gently eases away from the soft comfort of Tara’s arms.  Tara gently brushes away the tears on the slayer’s face and looks into her hazel eyes.  

Buffy looks back into the deep blue of Tara’s eyes and smiles when all she sees is compassion and caring coming from those blue depths.  “Thank you.” Buffy states simply, grateful for the simple fact that there was no recriminations, hatred or disgust coming from the Wiccan.

“You’re welcome.  If you want, I could double check the spell that was used to bring you back and see if there’s something that would explain about Spike being able to hurt you?” Tara questions quietly.

“Would you?  Please?” Buffy asks questioningly.

“Yes.  I would be more than happy to help you out in any way, Buffy.”  Tara hesitates looking at Buffy.  “You may not want to hear this, but I need to say it.  I’m not sorry we brought you back Buffy.  I am sorry that we pulled you out of Heaven.  But I’ll never be sorry to see you here and alive.  This world needs you in it.  And we’ll work through this.  It may take time, but I know we can get you through this, okay?”

Buffy smiles a full, heart felt smile at the blonde Wiccan and reaches over and hugs her tightly.  “Tara, thank you.  Thank you so much.  You can’t know what that means to me.  Every time someone apologizes, it’s like they’re sorry they brought me back.  And I keep thinking, why did you do it then?  But maybe, just maybe, they feel the same way and I just couldn’t understand what they were trying to say.”

“I honestly don’t believe anyone is sorry that we brought you back.  I just think that most of us are in shock and sad that you were at peace and happy in Heaven, then we took that away from you.  Buffy, if you feel the need to talk, anytime, day or night.  Please call me, or stop by.  Can you do that for me?  Promise me that you won’t do anything self-destructive, please?”  Tara questions with almost a sob in her voice.

Buffy takes a deep breath looking up at the blonde.  “I promise, Tara.  You can’t know how big of a weight this has lifted from me just being able to talk to someone about everything.  I actually feel a bit better.  I believe I did the right thing today, coming here to you.  You always seem to make everything better, don’t you?” Buffy asks questioningly tilting her head looking at the blonde witch.

Tara looks down shaking her head.  “I don’t know about that.  But I can listen and be there for you to talk to.  Be a shoulder to cry on if you need it.”

“Thank you.”  Buffy happens to glance over and sees that it’s after midnight.  “Crap, I didn’t realize it had gotten this late.  I need to go out and do a quick patrol and get home to Dawn.  Tara, I’m sorry…”

Tara interrupts.  “Don’t be sorry.  It is late and you have things to do.  I have classes tomorrow until 2:00 and then I’m going to research the spell for you and see what I can find out.  You can call me anytime, okay?”

Buffy nods and smiles at Tara as she gets up and heads to the door.  “I’ll call you tomorrow.  I won’t get off work ‘til 4:00, then I‘ll have to scrape the grease from my body after working at the DP all day.  Maybe, if it’s okay with you, I can stop tomorrow night while I’m out on patrol?”

“You’re welcome anytime, Buffy.  Please take care of yourself.” Tara smiles as Buffy heads out the door and nods her head at Tara acknowledging her statement.  Tara quietly shuts and locks the door.  ‘A very surprising, enlightening night.  Goddess, I’m going to need your help with this one.  I have to find a way so that Spike can’t hurt Buffy anymore.  Well, first things first.  Bed, classes and then research the spell.  Tomorrow is a new day.’ Tara thinks to herself as she gets ready for bed. 

***

Buffy actually finds herself smiling as she hits the cemeteries doing a quick patrol on the way home.  ‘Tara made me feel better already.  Why didn’t I think to talk to someone before things got so bad?  Why couldn’t I have gone to Tara instead of doing all those things with Spike?  She’s definitely one of a kind.  What did Willow do to her?  And no matter what, I know it couldn’t just be the magic.  Tara wouldn’t have moved out if that was all it was.’ Buffy shakes her head at herself.  ‘I’ll find out soon enough from Tara.  Hopefully she can talk to me about it.’

***

Chapter 3

“Buffy, is it okay if I spend the night tonight over at Janice’s?  Her mom invited me over for dinner and we’re working on a history project together.”  Dawn asks Buffy when she gets home after work.  “I promise we won’t be up late.”

“That’s fine Dawn.  I need to take a shower and get the DMP smell off me.  Then maybe grab something to eat and head out on patrol.  Is Willow here?”  Buffy asks having not actually seen the hacker in a couple days, ever since Willow had de-ratted Amy.

“No, she said something about her and Amy going to the Bronze then she headed out the door.  It seems she’s either at school or hanging with Amy all the time anymore.”  Dawn says with a hurt tone.  “I wish Tara was here.”

Buffy hesitantly reaches out to rub Dawn’s arm and Dawn looks up in surprise.  Buffy hasn’t touched or hugged her since they brought her back. 

“Dawn, I know it’s hard, but obviously something happened between Tara and Willow.  It’s something that the two of them will have to work out and no matter how much we might wish it, it probably isn’t anything we can do anything about.”  Buffy states softly.

Dawn throws her arms around Buffy, grateful for the contact and Buffy gently wraps her in her arms, hugging her tightly.  “It just doesn’t seem fair.  Tara is all upset, sad and crying all the time and Willow just acts like nothing’s wrong and goes out and does her thing.  I, I hate to say it, but I would rather have had Willow move out instead of Tara.  And before you say it, I know that I shouldn’t want that, but Willow just doesn’t seem to care about anything but herself lately, you know?”

“Honestly, I haven’t really talked or seen Willow in a while.  Between work and patrolling…” Buffy hesitates and mentally adds, screwing Spike…  “I haven’t been around a lot.  I’m sorry I’m not here for you that much Dawn.” 

Dawn sniffs lightly.  “I love you Buffy.  It has to get better, right?”  Dawn pulls away slightly and grins at her sister.  “Who knows what the future has in store for all of us.  Good things, hopefully!”

Buffy smiles slightly and runs her hand down Dawn’s hair.  “Hopefully.  Why don’t you go get your stuff together while I go get cleaned up and ready for patrol.  I’m going to stop in and see Tara tonight while I’m out.”

Dawn jumps slightly and gives a little squeak.  “Be sure to tell her I love her and miss her.  Give her a hug from me and see if she wants to get together this weekend and go out for movies and shakes, okay?” 

By the end of the ramble Buffy’s laughing.  “I’ll try and remember all that.  Would it be okay if I join you two for the movie run?”  Buffy questions, hoping that maybe she can start work on healing the rift between herself and Dawn. 

“Of course!  Buffy, I love you.  No matter what.  You’re my sister, the slayer and basically a wonderful person.”  Dawn says the last little bit with a glint in her eye and grinning from ear to ear at Buffy as she turns and runs up the stairs. 

Buffy yells at her following her up the stairs.  “What do you mean by basically a wonderful person?  You are an evil sister, you know that?”  She laughs as she heads into the bathroom for her shower. 

***

Buffy smiles slightly looking at the bag in her hands as she gently knocks on Tara’s door.  ‘Hopefully Tara likes the spicy General Tso’s Bean Curd I got her to eat.  Yesterday she looked like she had dropped probably a good ten pounds since she moved out.’  Her silent diatribe is cut short as Tara opens the door and glances from the bag up to Buffy’s eyes.

“Umm, I didn’t place an order for delivery.”  Tara quirks her lop-sided smile at Buffy looking at the full bag in the slayer’s hands as she steps back opening the door wider.

Buffy grins and states with a fake Chinese accent.  “Ah, but pretty lady needs much food.  Needs to keep her strength up to work big magic’s.”

Tara starts laughing at Buffy’s antics and shakes her head shutting the door behind her. 

“Have you had dinner yet?  I was hungry and I stopped and picked up Chinese for us.  Is that okay?”  Buffy asks almost worriedly.

“Buffy, that’s fine.  And no, I haven’t had anything to eat yet.”  Tara states setting the slayer’s mind at ease.

Buffy starts unpacking the food.  “I got you General Tso’s Bean Curd, hopefully you like it.  The man said that it is one of his big sellers as a vegetarian dish.  I did get some vegetable lo-mein and vegetable fried rice too.  I got myself Moo Goo Gai Pan.”  Buffy says frowning slightly as she pulls out each item, thinking about the fact that Tara stated she hadn’t eaten anything yet.

“Actually, that’s one of my favorite dishes.”  Tara grins sheepishly at Buffy.  “But where are we going to put all this food?  There’s enough to feed a small army.”

“Hey, I resemble that remark” Buffy states with a grin and pats her stomach.  “Where there’s a slayer, there are very few leftovers.”

Tara laughs as she grabs a couple waters from her mini fridge and sits down across from Buffy on the bed.  Grabbing her dinner and waving her pair of chopsticks at Buffy she asks “Do you want to talk about what I found out while we eat?  Or wait ‘til afterwards?”

Buffy stiffens slightly looking at Tara with an almost scared look in her eye.  “I….”

Tara interrupts seeing the look “Buffy, you didn’t come back wrong.  You can relax.  I found nothing that would indicate anything like that.”

Buffy breathes out a sigh of relief and smiles at Tara.  “Thank you.”

“No problem.  But I actually have a question for you that you might have to think on for a little while.”  Tara hesitates watching Buffy.  Buffy nods her head for Tara to continue.  “I want you to think back and see if you can remember Spike ever trying to hurt you after he got the chip.  I-I know that he t-tried to hurt W-willow, and couldn’t.  But did he ever try to h-hurt you?”

Buffy stops and looks off distantly as she chews.  ‘Did Spike every try and hurt me after the chip was implanted?  He was always hanging around, occasionally helping.  But being more of a pain in the ass than anything.  I don’t ever remember him taking a swing at me or trying to hurt me in any other way.  Huh.’

Tara takes a sip of her water watching Buffy as the emotions cross her face as she thinks back over the past.  “Buffy, I was just wondering if the reason he can hurt you isn’t because you were dead and came back wrong.  Not saying you did.  I know you didn’t come back wrong. But I was wondering if it isn’t because of your mystical Slayer powers that you don’t register as ‘human’ to his chip.”

Buffy’s eyes light up at that thought.  She reaches over lightly touching the blonde’s knee.  “I think you could be right.  I never remember Spike trying to hurt me after he got his chip in.”  She grins, pulling her hand back. 

Tara smiles and starts eating her dinner, happy that she could be of some help to the slayer.  Hesitantly she looks at Buffy, wondering to herself if she should mention the spell she found that might help. 

Buffy is watching Tara and sees that Tara seems to want to say something but is afraid to.  “What is it?”  Buffy asks softly.

Tara hesitates looking up at Buffy for a second “I-I came across a spell.  It m-might help you in regards to Spike, if you want.  Umm to where it might make his chip register you as human.”  Tara looks down at her lap, picking at the water bottle’s label.  “I p-put it on a necklace I had, if you w-want to try it?” 

Buffy looks at Tara with surprise.  ‘She researched the two spells, did her witchy-mojo on a necklace to help keep me from being hurt.  Willow, you were stupid to let her get away.’ 

Tara glances up briefly at Buffy before getting up to walk over to her bookshelf.  Grabbing the Celtic cross necklace that her mother had given her she walks slowly over to Buffy and hands it to her.  “My m-mother gave me this necklace.  She had put a protection charm on it which should add more power to the spell I did.  I-I hope this will work.”

Buffy shakes her head in shock.  Looking from the necklace and then up to Tara, she hands the necklace back to her.  “Tara, I can’t accept this.  Your mother gave you this.”

Tara puts her hands behind her back, not accepting the necklace.  Shaking her head she looks Buffy in the eye and states determinedly, “You need this more than I do.  She would want me to give it to you if she was here.  Trust me.”

Buffy smiles looking down at the necklace in her hands, gently running her fingers over the cross.  “It’s beautiful, Tara.  I don’t know how to thank you.”  She looks back up with a gentle smile at Tara, going to hand the necklace to her again.  “Would you please put it on for me?” 

Tara smiles, grateful the slayer isn’t going to argue over this as she reaches for the necklace and gently lifts Buffy’s hair out of the way as she puts the necklace around the slayer’s neck and latching it.  “There you go.  All ready now.” 

Tara starts gathering up what few leftovers there are laughing quietly at the fact that there is basically only some of her dinner left, along with a couple bites of lo mein.

Buffy helps gather up the trash and remembers what Dawn said earlier in the day. 

“Dawn wanted me to ask if you wanted to go out with us this weekend for shakes and movies?”

Tara smiles shaking her head slightly thinking about the teen.  “I would love to go out with Dawn this weekend.  That girl is gonna turn into a chocolate shake.”

Buffy laughs lightly, agreeing with Tara’s comment.  “Well, actually, if you don’t mind.  I was planning on tagging along with you two, if it’s okay?”

“Of course it’s okay, Buffy.  You don’t have to ask permission!”  Tara states with a smirk on her face.  “After all, you brought dinner.  It would be kinda rude of me to say you couldn’t go to the movies with us, now wouldn’t it?”

“Oh, so that’s the way it is.”  Buffy laughs joking with the blonde.  “I have to bribe my way into your affections, huh?”  Buffy states without thinking.

Tara winks at her, not thinking anything about the statement and grins broadly.  “Well, it doesn’t hurt, now does it?”

Buffy just smiles thinking how Tara seems to be doing much better tonight.  Wondering if she should bring up whatever had happened between her and Willow.

“D-did you see Spike tonight?”  Tara asks hesitantly.

Buffy shakes her head.  “No, I didn’t run across him.  I came across five vampires trying to snack on this guy outside the Bronze.  But that was all I came across tonight.  I’m glad I didn’t see him.  He’ll probably pop up on my way home and I can check and see if the necklace works.”

Tara frowns slightly thinking about Spike hurting Buffy.  She tilts her head forward letting her hair cover her face.  

“Hey, hey, none of that now.”  Buffy says lightly lifting Tara’s chin.  “Don’t worry about me.  I’ll goad him into a cheap shot and then tell him it’s over.  Hopefully it won’t take much reinforcement to get him to leave me alone.”  Buffy states with a little grin at the blonde.

“I j-just don’t like the idea of him hurting you.  Nobody deserves to be hurt like that.  As far as I’m concerned he was t-taking advantage of you.”  Tara states with a slight tremor in her voice. 

“Yeah, but I let him.”  Buffy states the fact. 

“Buffy.  You‘re hurting.  You needed someone that would help you, protect you.  You needed somebody that would be there for you, not take advantage of you.”  By then Tara had jumped off the bed and was pacing back and forth.  “H-he r-r-raped you.”  Tara raised her hand as Buffy was about to interrupt her.  “He did.  He was just looking out for himself.  He didn’t care about you or your feelings and took advantage of the fact that you were hurting.  You needed someone to understand, help you.  You didn’t need what he gave you.  You needed someone to just hold you.  Talk to you and be there for you.”

Finally Tara wound down and sat heavily on the bed looking at the floor.  Buffy reaches over to gently hold her hands.  “I wouldn’t let anybody be there for me, before.  It’s partially my fault.  But now, I… I’m willing to try and open up.  It’s not as raw as it was.  It still hurts, but it’s slowly getting better.”  Smiling slightly Buffy adds.  “A lot better today, talking to you took a huge weight from me.  I owe you.  Big time, Tara.”

Tara looks up, shaking her head.  “You don’t owe me a-anything Buffy.”

“I think we’ve talked enough about me to last a lifetime.  Are you, do you want to talk about what happened?”  Buffy hesitantly asks watching the Wiccan lower her head once more, pulling her hands away and wrapping her arms around herself.

“I-I-I don’t know if I can.”  A tear silently drops down Tara’s cheek as she quickly glances up and then back down again.

“Please, Tara.  You need someone to talk to.  You can’t keep everything inside.  You need someone to talk to, be there for you, just like I do.  Please?”  Buffy whispers quietly.  Begging Tara to open up.

“You know about the spell that she did, causing us all t-to lose our m-memories?”  Buffy nods her head, that night was when Tara had moved out of the house.  “That w-wasn’t the f-first time she used it on m-me.”  Buffy’s eyes got wide, looking at Tara.  “I know f-for a fact, that she did it at l-least once more.  I don’t know how many times she might h-have performed it.”  Tara states on a sob, holding herself tighter.

“S-s-she uses magic for the simplest of things.  She e-even uses it for doing housecleaning, research, dressing herself.  I-I tried t-to tell h-her that it’s wrong, but she w-won’t listen.  W-we argued about it b-before.  Then I f-found out she did the forget spell on me. I almost l-left her then, but s-she promised me she w-wouldn’t use magic for a week.”  Here Tara lets out a sarcastic snort.  “A week.  She d-didn’t even l-last 12 hours.  That’s when she screwed up and the spell back-fired, making everyone forget.  The power is too much, she doesn’t realize, or doesn’t want to realize that what she’s doing is wrong.”  Looking up with sad, tear-filled eyes Tara swallows hard.  “I can n-never t-t-trust her again, Buffy.”

“I didn’t realize… Tara, I am so sorry.  I didn’t know that it was that bad.”  Buffy shakes her head, not wanting to believe, even though knowing in her heart what Tara said was true.  Is Tara right?  Did Willow do other spells on her?  God, if she did that to Tara, her everything, how hard would it be to do a spell on someone else?

“Is there something we can do?  Something to see if there were other spells done?  Something to maybe reverse the spell?”  Buffy asks her mind going 100 miles per minute, trying to see if there is something that can be done.

“I haven’t b-been able to c-come up with anything yet.  And truthfully, I don’t know if I would undo the spell or spells.  What if I found out that my loving her was a spell Buffy?  What if, God forbid, she did spells on someone else?  Where would it end?  I’m almost afraid what the consequences would be if she had done any other spells.”  Tara breaks down and curls up on the bed into a tight ball, shaking and crying. 

Buffy swallows hard, not knowing what to do, tears flowing down her own face at the never ending possibilities.  Needing comfort herself, she lays down behind Tara, wrapping her arms around for comfort while crying with her. 

Finally about half an hour later, they’ve both calmed down somewhat and Buffy eases up to a sitting position with her back against the headboard, while lightly running her hand over Tara’s hair in a comforting gesture.  “I was wondering…”  Buffy trails off, not knowing if it is possible or not.

“What, Buffy?”  Tara asks, uncurling her stiff body, to slowly pull herself up to a sitting position beside the slayer.

“Is there some kind of charm to protect us from magic use?  Or even magic use against one particular person?”  Buffy asks still trying to think of something to help.

Tara stops and looks at Buffy with a wondering look.  “Why didn’t I think of this?  You’re brilliant!!”  Tara jumps off the bed, running to her magic books, quickly flipping through three of them before finding the one she needs.  Sitting back down beside Buffy on the bed, she quietly reads the spell and the ingredients.  “This is a relatively simple spell to do.  I have most of the ingredients here…”  Tara trails off looking up at Buffy for a moment.  “We’ll need something personal of hers, hair would probably be the best thing.  Do you think…?”

Buffy smiles, glad that she thought of something that could be helpful and as Tara trailed off she realized what the Wiccan was asking of her.  “Oh, oh.  Yeah, I can get the hair out of her hairbrush.  She isn’t home that much, so it shouldn’t be a problem.  Is there anything else you need?”

Shaking her head, Tara smiles as she takes a deep, cleansing breath.  Feeling better than she has in the past month, since the Tabula Rasa spell.  “Thank you, Buffy.  I d-didn’t want to s-say anything before, but I w-was thinking about t-transferring out at the end of the school year.”

Buffy’s eyes widen and she starts shaking her head vehemently.  “No, not a possibility.  I can’t, no I won’t let you run away!  I need you here.  You’re keeping me sane.  I know I’m being selfish, but if I have to hog tie you I will!  Hell, Dawn will probably help me.  No, she wouldn’t help, she’d push me out of the way and do it herself!  God, Tara, you’re family.  No matter what, please promise me you won’t leave.  Please!”  Buffy grabs Tara to her in an oxygen depriving hug, begging. 

Tara’s eyes get big at the slayer’s comments.  Actually realizing for the first time how much of an impact her being there might actually mean to these wonderful people.  Little insignificant Tara has actually found a home.  Hugging Buffy back tightly she half-laughs.  “I promise I won’t leave, but, Buffy I need to breathe!”

Buffy hurriedly loosens her grip apologizing profusely.

“Buffy, Buffy!  It’s okay.  No harm.”  Tara laughs quietly, letting the slayer know that everything is okay. 

Looking at the clock, seeing that it’s almost 1 a.m., Buffy sighs.  “I guess I should be going.  See if I can scrounge Spike up to tell him it’s over.”  Buffy stops reaching up to touch the Celtic cross.  “And see if this does the trick.  I’ll try and get the hair for the charms.  Don’t forget, shakes and a movie Saturday night we’ll come by here and grab you!”

Tara smiles gently at Buffy.  “If I don’t talk to you before then.  Be careful.”

Smiling back at the blonde, Buffy heads out the door, grateful that she could be of some help to Tara. 

***

Chapter 4

Patrolling Restfield cemetery, Buffy feels a vampire and looks around seeing Spike lurking against a tree, smoking a cigarette.  Taking a deep breath, she decides she really needs to end things, so heads over to talk to the vampire. 

“Spike.  Whatever sick thing that is going on between us is over.”  Buffy states in a no nonsense tone.

Spike snorts, looking at Buffy. “Yeah, right Slayer.  You need me.  I got what you need.  Who did you come to, to make you feel when you came back, huh?”

“I don’t need you.  I need…”  Buffy thinks about Tara, the friendship she is offering.  “I need a friend.  I need someone to help me, be there for me.  Not someone that is just using me for his own sick agenda!”

Spike snarls angrily.  “Fuck you, slayer.  You came back wrong, even my chips says so.”  Spike takes a swing at Buffy, hitting her in the jaw and spins away, vamping out in pain.  “What the fu-”  He screams.

Buffy angrily kicks him upside the head.  “I didn’t come back wrong.  I’m human.  I want, no I need to live.  Being with you was a mistake that I’m not going to make again.  I have friends and I’m going to talk to them.  Apologize, and hopefully they will forgive me.”  Buffy states while hitting Spike again, knocking him down to the ground.  “I suggest you leave me alone, Spike.  Stay away from us.  I appreciate the help you have given us in the past.  But I think for everyone’s sake that it would be best if you leave Sunnydale.”

“You can’t make me leave Slayer.  This is my home.”  Spike spits out the blood from his busted mouth onto the ground.  “You ain’t my boss.  Whatever bug is up your ass, you’ll come around.  You got a thing for the Big Bad, Slayer and you’ll come around.  And when you do, I’ll be here!”  Spike snarls as he heads off into the night.

Buffy shakes her head before stating calmly.  “You’re wrong Spike.  I just realized I have reasons for living.  Friends and family.  People that need saving from the evil here in Sunnydale.  I have millions of reasons.  I don’t need you.  I have what I need and I just didn’t realize it.” 

Buffy finished patrolling, killing a couple more vampires before heading to an empty home. 

Knocking on Willow’s bedroom door, to let her know she’s home, she doesn’t get an answer and peeks in, looking around.  ‘No one here.  Perfect time to get the hair strands.’  Buffy heads to the dresser, grabbing the hairbrush and pulling ten or fifteen hair strands from the brush.  ‘I hope this will be enough.’

Glancing around the room Buffy wonders how things had gone so wrong, so quickly.  Heading back to her room, she gets ready for bed.  If there is hope for herself, maybe other things will work out.

***

Tara smiles at Dawn as she drinks her chocolate shake.  Shaking her head she looks at Buffy who’s snickering quietly.  “Dawn, that’s your second shake!  Aren’t you getting brain freeze from sucking them down that quickly?”  

Buffy starts laughing out loud at that comment.  “I think she could drink a gallon of milk shakes in one breath and still want more.” 

Shrugging her shoulder Dawn looks from Buffy to Tara.  “What can I say.  I love my shakes.  That movie kind of sucked.  But the shakes are cheering me up nicely!” 

“Maybe next time you’ll let someone else pick the movie, then Dawnie.”  Tara smiles knowingly at the young girl.

Buffy snorts stating.  “Yeah, right.  Like that’ll ever happen.”

Dawn looks at Buffy with a frown.  “Like you’re one to talk.  All you ever want to see is horror or fighting.  Like you don’t get enough of that in real life!”

“Hey, they’re funny!”  Buffy defends herself.  “They’re more like comedies instead of true horror flicks!”  Buffy turns to grin at Tara when she notices Tara stiffening and looking down quickly at the table.  Turning around she sees Willow and Amy coming in the ice cream shop. 

Reaching over to gently cover Tara’s hand with her own Buffy quietly states. “It’ll be okay.” 

Dawn looks from Buffy to Tara and back again.  Scooting closer to Tara she grabs her hand, holding it tightly in her own.  “Are you okay?” 

Tara nods her head, not making eye contact with either of the Summers’ girls.  

Willow looking around realizes that Tara is there with Buffy and Dawn.  Frowning slightly, she walks over to them, with Amy following her.

“Hi guys.  What are you doing here?”  Willow asks pointedly looking at Tara.

Dawn answers almost heatedly.  “We’re here having milk shakes.  What are you doing here?”  Looking from Willow to Amy and back. 

“We’ve been at the Bronze.  Wow!  I didn’t realize how powerful Willow has gotten.  She’s like way outclassed me in the witchiness department.”  Amy gushes, lightly touching Willow’s arm. 

Tara looks up sharply with a frown on her face, looking at Willow.  Shaking her head to herself she looks at Buffy then turns to Dawn.  “I need to go.  I’ll see you two later.”

“Tara I want to talk to you.”  Willow demands before Tara gets up from her chair.

“Willow, leave well enough alone for now, okay?”  Buffy quietly states, trying to diffuse the situation. 

“You can’t tell me what to do!”  Willow hisses her eyes darkening.

Quickly standing up Tara reaches across to gently place her hand on Buffy’s arm.  “I-it’s okay.  I’ll t-talk to her.”  Looking briefly at Willow she turns and walks a couple tables down, in the almost empty ice cream parlor, she sits with Willow sitting across from her.  Looking down at the table, with her hands clasped in her lap she sits quietly waiting for Willow to start.

“Why haven’t you returned any of my calls?”  Willow asks heatedly.  “You belong with me.”

Tara looks up quickly at the face of the woman who used to be her world.  Not seeing the kind face anymore.  Shaking her head sadly Tara sighs quietly.  “Willow… I c-can’t come back to you.  I can’t ever t-trust you again.”  Holding Willow’s eyes trying to make her understand.  “You took my m-memories away f-from me.   Twice.”  Frowning Tara asks.  “Was it only t-twice?”

“All it was, was a stupid little spell, Tara.  I won’t do it again.”  Willow states not really answering her question.

Jerking her head up at Willow, Tara shakes her head.  “You don’t understand, do you?  YOU TOOK MY MEMORIES.  You are playing God, Willow!  Goddess!!  After what I went through with Glory stealing my sanity, you are just going to play with my mind?  What gives you the right?  I want you to leave me alone Willow.  I’m not asking.”  Tara jumps up from the table hurrying from the ice cream shop. 

Buffy looks at Dawn, both of them hearing every word. “Come on.”

Dawn hurries after Tara as Buffy hesitates beside Willow who’s still sitting at the table in stunned silence.  “Willow.  For everyone’s sake.  Please let this go.  Right now she can’t be around you.”

Looking up at Buffy with the blackness creeping into her eyes Willow snarls at Buffy.  “She’s mine.  And I will get her back.”

Buffy frowns, leaning in nose to nose with Willow.  “I don’t know who you think you are, Willow.  But you aren’t the same person who was my friend all these years.  You’re letting the power go to your head.  Leave. Her. Alone.  Understand?” 

With a flick of her hand, Willow magically throws Buffy against the opposite wall before leaving the ice cream shop.  

Shaking her head, trying to get her bearings Buffy sees Amy in front of her, holding out her hand.  “I…  I’m sorry.  Willow has changed so much since high school.   I didn’t realize…” 

Buffy shakes her head at Amy, grasping her hand and hopping up off the floor.  “She isn’t listening to any of us.  If you have any sway with her at all, please try and talk some sense into her.  I have to go after Tara and Dawn.”

***

Running towards the campus, hoping that’s where Dawn and Tara were heading, Buffy rounds a corner, seeing them ahead of her she releases a breath of thanks that she‘s found them and quickly catches up to them.

Walking up to the opposite side of Tara, she lightly puts her arm around her waist, since Dawn has her arm wrapped around the shaking Wiccan’s shoulder.

“I didn’t realize how bad she’s gotten.”  Dawn whispers looking at Buffy worriedly.  “Buffy are you okay?”

Tara looks up and at Buffy, seeing a spot of blood at the corner of the slayer’s mouth. 

Buffy frowns, seeing where she’s looking and reaches with her free hand, wiping the spot of blood away.  “Sorry, yeah I’m okay.”

Frowning intensely, Tara questions.  “What did she do?”

Shaking her head Buffy looks at the Wiccan’s eyes and slumps her shoulders.  “She threw me against the wall with magic.”

Eyes tearing up, Tara shakes her head.  “I should l-leave.  It w-would be b-best if I…”

Dawn and Buffy interrupt.  “NO.”

Buffy smiles slightly at Dawn.  “Tara, we already had this conversation.  We’re not allowing you to leave.  We will work through this.  I promise you.  I…” hesitating slightly Buffy looks at Dawn before continuing.  Deciding Dawn should probably know what’s going on.  “I got the ingredient you needed for the spell.”  Pulling the envelope out of her back pocket she hands it to Tara.  “Maybe we should see about doing up something for everyone, to be on the safe side.”  She states looking pointedly at Dawn.

“What are you talking about, Buffy?”  Dawn asks worriedly.

Knowing what Buffy is trying to ask without saying anything Tara nods her head slowly in agreement.  “Dawnie, we need to talk to you about something.  L-let’s go back to my dorm room, okay?”

***

“You mean she could have been playing with all our memories?”  Dawn had turned pale and almost looked like she was ready to throw up.  “I can’t believe… surely she wouldn’t…”  Stopping and looking at Tara she remembers the argument the two witches had had then how Tara acted afterwards, as if nothing had happened.  Knowing now, that Willow had used a forget spell on Tara.  Slumping her shoulders knowing in her heart what Willow has done.  “She would.  She has.”

Tara glances up at Buffy worry on her face before pulling Dawn into her arms.  “Dawnie, I wish I didn’t have to tell you…”

“No, no.  I’m glad you did.  I understand better now.”  Dawn whispers in between quiet sobs.  “It’s just so hard to believe.”  Looking up into the woman she considers a sister and sometimes surrogate mother Dawn asks.  “Is there anything I can do to help?” 

Sitting down beside Dawn, Buffy strokes her hair.  “Thank you Dawn for offering.  If we can think of anything, we’ll let you know, okay?”  Buffy half smiles at her sister, proud of the fact that she seems to be growing up.  “I hoped you would be able to be a child a while longer, but it seems you’re growing up quick, kiddo.” 

Dawn snorts around a sob.  “Hello!  We live on the Hellmouth Buffy.  You’re a slayer, Tara’s a witch and I’m a mystical key!  Our lives are not normal and I don’t think I’ve ever been a child!”  

Everybody gave kind of a sad laugh while hugging each other tightly.  Pulling back slightly Tara half smiles at Dawn.  “Do you want to help me with the spell?”

Buffy smiles as Dawn bounces up and down in excitement.  “Tara, would it be okay if Dawn stays here while I go out on patrol?” 

Smiling at the slayer Tara nods her head then frowns slightly.  “Umm, how did the other night go?”

Buffy looks confused for a moment before reaching up, touching the cross and looking at Tara.  Seeing Tara nod she smiles real big.  “The other night went great.”

Sighing in relief Tara smiles happily at the slayer.  “Good.”

Dawn frowns. “What are you two talking about now?”  

Buffy smiles softly at her sister.  “Dawn, it’s something personal, and with everything else that has happened tonight, can we maybe wait until I… Get my own head around it before talking to you about it?   I promise I will explain to you eventually, just not right now, okay?”

Searching her sister’s eyes and seeing that she’s being sincere she nods her head, hugging Buffy close.  “Okay.  Just don’t forget.”

“I won’t.”  Buffy smiles looking over Dawn’s shoulder at the caring and support in the blonde Wiccan’s eyes. 

***

“Well, that’s it.  Hopefully it will work.”  Tara smiles at Dawn, taking the amber colored stones that the wax was turned into over to her desk to make into necklaces.  “You want to help make the necklaces?”  Tara asks looking over her shoulder at Dawn. 

“Sure!”  Dawn hops up walking over. Tara is spreading newspaper out and putting the jeweler’s cement on it along with the other items needed to make the necklaces. 

Gluing the stones into the settings took just a few minutes.   Grabbing the black cord like string Tara unlatches, sliding one of the stones on and hands it to Dawn.  “There’s your own home-made necklace, Dawnie.” 

Doing up the rest of the stones on the cords Tara stops looking down at the other four necklaces. 

Dawn sees her hesitating and gently rubs her shoulder “What’s wrong Tara?”

Shaking her head she looks worriedly at Dawn.  “I don’t know how to explain to Xander and Anya about Willow.  Anya will probably be easier than Xander.  Xander has been her best friend forever.  I don’t think he’ll believe me.”  Tara whispers almost broken hearted.  

Hearing a light knock at the door Tara stiffens slightly and relaxes when she hears Buffy.  “It’s me.”   Quickly opening the door she smiles at the slayer.  “How was patrol?”

Buffy grins.  “Killed four vampires, a demon that was like three feet tall that thought I would make a good chew toy and helped out a co-ed that got her hand stuck between the railing and the wall on the stairs.”

“So, besides being the slayer you played good Samaritan also?”  Tara smiles winningly at Buffy.  “You know, you are really a wonderful person Buffy.”

Blushing slightly Buffy shakes her head looking down at her feet.  “So did you guys get the necklaces done?”  She asks looking back up. 

Inhaling deeply and reaching over for one of the necklaces Tara nods.  “Yes, we did.  Here is one for you.”  She hands it to Buffy who quickly slips it over her head.  Reaching over to grab one for herself and putting it on.  Picking up the other two she looks at Buffy, handing them to her.  “I think it might be better coming from you, instead of me.” 

Buffy looks down at the last two necklaces and up at Tara, nodding her head slowly.  “I’ll talk to Anya first and then we’ll both try to talk to Xander.”  Knowing Xander would be the hardest to convince. 

“Well, we should probably head home, Dawn.”  Buffy states, rubbing the girl’s head lightly. 

Looking at Tara with pleading eyes Dawn asks.  “Can I stay here tonight?  I really don’t want to see…”  Trailing off looking down quickly.

Buffy looks at Tara silently asking her if it was okay and at Tara’s nod she smiles.  “Thanks, Tara.  Yes, you may, but you have to promise to be good for Tara!” 

“I’m always good for Tara!”  Dawn replies indignantly.  

Raising her hands in self defense Buffy grins “Okay, okay.  You’re always good for Tara - it’s just me that you are rotten for.” 

Dawn whines.  “Buffy!”

Buffy grins, as she puts the necklaces in her pocket and walks to the door.  “You two have a good night.”

Tara smiles gently.  “Please be careful.  Call me and let me know you made it home okay.”

“I will.”  Buffy smiles slightly, walking out the door and heading home. 

***

Chapter 5

Buffy walks into her house, stopping in shock.  All of Willow’s things are piled up in the living room.  “Willow?!”  Buffy shouts.

Willow comes down the stairs with her laptop in her hand.  “What, Buffy?”  She growls at the slayer.

“Where are you going?”  Buffy asks taking a step back at the growl. 

“I’m leaving, what does it look like?”  Willow snarls before waving her hand at her pile of stuff, making it disappear.  “I’m going back home.”

Buffy reaches out to grab Willow by the arm. “You don’t have to leave Willow.  We can work through this!” 

Willow turns on Buffy quickly flicking her hand like she did earlier and when nothing happens her eyes widen.  “What did you do?”  She growls, physically pushing the slayer away from her.  “Don’t you trust me, you had to go and get some piss ant charm to negate magic?”

As Willow pushed Buffy away, the Celtic cross swung out of Buffy’s shirt to where Willow could see it.  Willow closes the distance between them pointing to the cross.  “That’s Tara’s cross.  Her mother gave it to her.”  Giving the slayer a hateful look.  “Why are you wearing it?”   Poking the slayer in the chest.  “Are you fucking her now?  Did you decide you wanted to see what it’s like to fuck my girlfriend?”  Willow’s eyes are completely black, she tries another spell on the slayer that gets absorbed. 

“Willow!!  NO!  She thought I needed it more than her.  Nothing is going on between us!”  Buffy pleads with Willow.  “Please, Willow.  You are out of control.  You need help.  Can’t you see what you’re doing?  Please let someone help you!” 

Willow slaps the slayer hard across the face.  “I AM NOT OUT OF CONTROL.  Tara is mine and I will get her back.  Stay away from me!”  Willow slams out of the house, leaving a stunned slayer standing alone in the living room.

“Oh, God!  What are we going to do?”  Buffy states to the empty house.  Shaking her head in despair she quickly goes to the phone to call Tara.

“Tara.  Yeah I made it home okay, but…  She was here, but she’s gone now.  To let you know, the necklace works, the magic just seemed to slide right off.  But…  We need to talk.  I can’t have this conversation with you over the phone.  Can you and Dawn come to the house?  Please take a cab… Okay, I’ll see you in a few minutes.”  Buffy sits down dejectedly on the couch. 

***

After explaining to Dawn and Tara what had transpired at the house such a short time ago, Buffy watches with haunted eyes as Dawn runs to the bathroom, throwing up.  Looking over to Tara the blonde didn’t seem to be in much better shape than Dawn. 

Paling, Tara roughly wipes her shaking hands down her face.  “Goddess.  What can we do?”  Looking up at Buffy with fear in her eyes.  “We have to find some way to reach her, Buffy.  If we don’t…”  Shaking her head Tara starts to cry. 

Getting up off the couch and walking over to the Wiccan sitting in the chair, Buffy kneels down, pulling her into a tight hug.  “I’m going to call Giles.  See if he has any ideas.”  Hearing Dawn come back down the stairs Buffy lifts her head up, watching her.  “Are you okay Dawn?”   She asks worriedly.

Dawn shakes her head no.  “But I will be.  We have to figure out something.”  She sits down on the arm of the chair, hooking her arm around Tara’s shoulder.  “We have to find some way to help her, and until then we have to be here for each other, right?”  She asks hopefully looking from Buffy to Tara.

Buffy, nodding her head pulls back, still holding Tara loosely in her arms.  “I want you to stay here with us.  I don’t like the idea of you being at the dorms by yourself.”

Tara shakes her head.  “I can’t stay in the room W-Will… we shared.”  She states between quiet sobs.  

“You can stay in my room tonight.  Tomorrow I’ll switch out my stuff and put it in…the other bedroom and we’ll get your stuff from the dorm.”  Buffy hesitated almost calling it Willow’s room. 

“Dawn, can you help Tara upstairs and get her settled?”  Buffy asks quietly. 

Nodding her head Dawn helps Tara stand up, walking with her up the stairs.  “Come on Tara, why don’t you go lay down.  We’ll talk more in the morning.”  Dawn states as Tara climbs into Buffy’s bed still shaking slightly. 

Looking up with pain filled eyes Tara nods.  “We’ll figure something out.”  Laying her head down she slowly falls asleep. 

Dawn watches her for a few minutes, gently pushing her hair from her face with a frown. 

“We need to make sure you’re safe.”  She whispers quietly to the sleeping Wiccan before heading back downstairs. 

Buffy’s standing there with the phone in her hand, shaking slightly.  Hearing Dawn come back down the stairs she looks up questioningly.

“She’s asleep.  Buffy… we need to make sure that Willow doesn’t hurt her.”  Dawn states with firm resolve.  “Whatever it takes.  I love Willow, but…”

Buffy rubs her hand across her face and looks Dawn in the eye “I know Dawn.  I love Willow too.  But, that isn’t Willow right now.  Tara has been through enough in her life… I’ll do everything I can to protect her.  Why don’t you go and try and get some sleep?  I’m going to call and talk to Giles.” 

Dawn hugs her sister tightly before whispering goodnight and heading up the stairs. 

Watching Dawn climb the stairs Buffy shakes her head, thinking to herself.  ‘She’s dealing so well with this.  Better than I ever expected.  She is definitely growing up.  Damn, time for a phone call that I really wish I didn’t have to make.’

***

“Buffy, I don’t know what to say.”  Giles states worriedly.

“Giles, tell me you’re going to help, and for God’s sake stop cleaning your glasses.  You’re going to rub a hole in them.”  Buffy finally tells the watcher, with a dejected sigh.

“How… Never mind.  I’ll talk with the Coven here in Devon and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.  I don’t know if they’ll be able to do anything, but maybe they’ll have some ideas.”  Hesitating for a moment Giles asks quietly and sincerely.  “Would you like me to come back, Buffy?”

“Giles…”  Hesitating momentarily Buffy stops her original reaction of wanting to say yes.  “I would always love for you to be here, Giles.  But… I would rather you find out anything at all you can to help us and let me know.  Giles… you’re like a father to me, more so than my real father ever was.  I miss you.”  Buffy states the last extremely quietly, not even knowing if Giles heard her or not. 

“Oh, Buffy.  I miss you too.  I’ll contact the coven as soon as I’m off the phone with you.  I’ll also check out all the books I can get my hands on and see if there is anything I can do to help.  Is everyone okay?”  Giles asks worriedly.

“Yeah, Tara made up some kind of magic deflector things that work against Willow, if she tries magic on any of us.  I have to get Xander and Anya’s to them, and try to talk to them about Willow.”  Inhaling deeply Buffy feels a little better talking to Giles about Willow. 

“Tara was able to make a defense against Willow?”  Giles asks with concern. 

“Yeah, she used some ingredients and some of Willow’s hair to make these stones, which we’re wearing as necklaces.  It works great.  Willow tried to blast me twice and it’s like the stones just absorbed the magic.”  Buffy explains with a prideful note in her voice.

Giles surprised to the say the least states quietly.  “Buffy, that takes a lot of power, and she made one for everybody?” 

“Yes, she made five of them.  She said it was an easy spell.  How much power are you talking about Giles?”  Buffy asks questioningly.

“A lot.  I believe our dear Tara is a lot stronger, more powerful witch than any of us realized.”  Giles yanks his glasses back off, chewing on the end thinking. 

Buffy thinks back over past conversations “You know, Willow was always saying that Tara was powerful and Tara would just shake her head stating she wasn’t… do you think she even realizes?”

“I don’t know, Buffy.  She may not.  She has always come across to me as a very well-balanced witch.  She never really used her talents from what I can gather.  She doesn’t take her power for granted and she doesn’t use it unless she needs to.  I might talk to the coven about Tara, also.  It might be best if she studies with a coven during the summer to realize her potential.”  Giles shakes his head, first things first, old man.  “Let me get off here and call the Coven, Buffy.  I’ll get back to you once I hear anything.  Please take care of yourself.  Call me if you need me.”  He states gently. 

“Thanks Giles.  I appreciate anything you can find out.  Bye.”  Buffy states quietly before hanging up the phone, pacing back and forth in the kitchen.  Looking over at the clock on the stove realizing it’s almost four in the morning she shakes her head, deciding to check on Tara and Dawn, before trying to get a couple hours sleep herself.

*** 

Chapter 6

As Tara heads down the stairs the next morning, she sees Buffy asleep on the couch.  Frowning slightly she walks over gently covering her with the throw. 

Waking up Buffy looks confused for a moment before realizing that Tara was trying to cover her up with a blanket.  Stretching and yawning she smiles embarrassedly at the blonde.  “Good morning.”

Tara shakes her head, “I’m sorry I woke you.  I didn’t mean to make you sleep on the couch, you could have slept upstairs.  The bed was big enough for both of us.” 

Buffy chuckles quietly.  “I would rather not have you waking up finding yourself wrapped up in my arms trying to figure out what’s going on!” 

Tara raises an eyebrow at that.  “Waking up in your arms, huh?”

Buffy blushes slightly.  “Yeah, I kind of like to snuggle and…”  Raising her hands in the air.  “There’s no telling where these might have ended up.  Bad juju all the way around.”

Laughing at the slayer Tara shakes her head.  “I’m sure we could have worked around it, Buffy.  But thanks for the consideration.  Are you hungry?”

Smiling at the blonde’s typical response she nods her head.  And laughs as Dawn comes pounding down the stairs.

“Pancakes!”  Dawn exclaims bouncing over to the blonde, putting her arm around her shoulders grinning down at Buffy who’s sitting on the couch.

Buffy nods her head in agreement. 

“Pancakes it is.  Why don’t you two go get cleaned up while I start making them, then we’ll start moving stuff around?”  Tara takes a deep breath and smiles, glad to be back in the one place she considers home since her mother died.  Frowning slightly thinking about Willow.

“Hey, hey.”  Buffy states quickly jumping up off the couch.  “No serious thoughts just yet.  We’ll get everything figured out eventually.  It might take some time, but hopefully it will work out.”   She states hugging Tara and Dawn tightly to her. 

“Okay.”  Hoping Buffy’s right, Tara smiles as she pulls away and heads towards the kitchen to make pancakes as Buffy and Dawn head upstairs to freshen up.

***

“Okay, we got everything of mine switched and the beds are stripped and sheets are in the washer and dryer.  As soon as Xander and Anya get here we’ll go to your dorm room and pick up your stuff.”  Buffy states with a smile. 

A few minutes later Xander comes in followed quickly by Anya.  “So what’s up guys?  Hi Tara!  You and Willow get back together?”  Xander looks around and frowns.  “Where is Willow?” 

“Uh, Xander you might want to sit down.”  Buffy states quietly.  “We need to have a serious conversation with you and Anya.”

Anya nods her head, knowing what is going on.  She saw all the signs.  She wasn’t a vengeance demon for 1200 years for nothing.  Looking at Tara and seeing the worry on her face she lightly pats her on the arm.  “It will be okay, Tara.  We will help in whatever way we can.”  Anya states quietly before sitting down beside Xander.

Tara looks surprised then thankful at the ex-demon.  Reaching down to the coffee table, Tara picks up the two necklaces that Buffy had laid there earlier.  Handing one to Anya and then Xander, Anya raises her eyebrow in surprise looking up at Tara.

“Is this what I think it is?”  Anya asks questioningly.

Looking Anya in the eyes Tara nods her head.  “Yes it is.”  Looking over to Buffy then Dawn she takes a deep breath.  “We think it would be best if you two wore it at all times.  W-W-will…”   Stopping trying to keep control, Buffy gently pats her shoulder, motioning her to sit down and glancing at Dawn.  

Dawn sits down on the arm of the chair next to the blonde, holding her hand keeping quiet as Buffy explains what has happened.  Everything.  She and Tara had discussed how much to let their friends know and they both decided it would be best to tell them everything about Willow and what had happened and was happening. 

Xander jumps up.  “No!  She wouldn’t ever do that!  She wouldn’t hurt any of us.”  He shouts in denial.  They had barely made it past the memory spell.

“Xander, please listen to us.  Let us explain everything.  Remember the spell?  Remember how we forgot who we were?  That was Willow!!”  Buffy cries, trying to get through to her other best friend.

Shaking his head Xander sits down.  “But, why?”  He questions. 

Tara looks up at him and starts to open her mouth to answer but Anya beats her to it.  Looking Xander in the eye and holding his hand she states bluntly.  “She is addicted to the power, having control.  It will be very hard to reason with her, if we can.”  Looking at
Buffy she nods her head.  “Please continue.  He will listen quietly until you are done.”  She states looking at Xander with a warning glare. 

Xander looks back and nods his head in acquiesce.  

As Buffy finishes telling them everything up to and including the night before, Xander is quietly crying, and Anya is holding him, patting his back. 

Looking up at Tara, Anya states bluntly.  “I am sorry that I did not see this before.  If you want, I can contact D’Hoffryn and see if…” 

Tara jumps up shaking her head, “No Anya.  I don’t wish vengeance on her, or anyone.  We just need to see if we can help her.  I’m just afraid she may be too far gone to accept any help.”

Nodding her head in acceptance, Anya puts the necklace on and looks at Xander.  “It will protect you against any magic she tries to do against you, Xander.  Please wear it.  We do not know if she has possibly used other spells against the rest of us.  It would be best to wear it at all times.”

Buffy looks in surprise at the ex-demon, she hadn’t explained about the necklaces yet.  “How did you…?”

Anya looks at Buffy.  “I know quite a lot, Buffy.  I see quite a few things, also.  I keep quiet most of the time.”  Shrugging her shoulders she smiles at Tara.  “I wish I had seen this beforehand, maybe we could have stopped her before it got this bad.”

Tara shakes her head at Anya.  “I have tried talking to her about it in the past.  Multiple times, as a matter of fact, that she was using magic too much.  She didn’t want to hear it.”  Looking down at the floor, Tara states quietly.  “She wants it more than she wanted me.  You can’t fight for someone if they don‘t see what is wrong and are willing to change.”  Feeling Dawn squeeze her shoulder lightly Tara looks up smiling sadly.

Buffy looks at Xander.  “Would you mind taking me and Tara over to the dorm so we can pack her stuff up?  I want her to move back in here with me.  I’d feel safer having her close by instead of by herself.”

Nodding his head Xander stands up, still somewhat in shock as he processes everything that was said, trying to wrap his mind around his best friend’s changes. 

Anya looks at Buffy.  “That is a very good idea.  I can stay here and keep Dawn company while you get her stuff.   Would we like to order pizza for lunch?”  

Buffy smiles, actually grateful for the ex-demon.  “We’ll order it before we leave the dorm and pick it up on the way back.  It shouldn’t take too terribly long to pack Tara up with the three of us.” 

Tara smiles briefly, standing up to follow Xander out of the house with Buffy following behind.

***

Tara stops just inside the door of her dorm room, looking around. 

Buffy accidentally bumps into her, not realizing she stopped.  “What’s wrong?” 

Tara shakes her head looking for anything out of place.  “Willow was here.”

“How…?”  Buffy states looking at the Wiccan’s room.

“I can feel magic.  She knows I’m the one that did the charms.”  Tara states before walking over to her desk that still has some of the spell ingredients sitting on it.  Closing her eyes she sends her senses out trying to see if Willow had booby trapped or taken anything. 

Opening her eyes she looks into Buffy and Xander’s worried eyes. “It doesn’t look like she’s done anything or taken anything.”  Shaking slightly she reaches into the closet grabbing out the boxes that she hasn’t even had time to dispose of after finally unpacking the rest of her stuff. 

Handing one of the boxes to Xander she quietly asks him to fill it with her books as she hands one to Buffy telling her to just fill it up with any knick knacks and spell ingredients she comes across.   She heads over to the dresser pulling it open, quickly stuffing her box full of clothes.  Grabbing another box, she quickly strips her bed, folding up the sheets and blanket putting it in the box looking around seeing that Buffy and Xander had filled their boxes up.  Grabbing her clothes that are on the hangers, she lays them on the bed. 

Quickly double-checking all the drawers and the closet, each of them grabbing a box, taking it down to Xander’s vehicle before heading back up to make the call for pizza and grabbing the rest of the items. 

***

It’s a quiet, solemn group of Scoobies that eat the pizza back at Buffy’s house.  They had quickly brought in Tara’s stuff, taking it upstairs and sitting it on the floor before eating.

As Xander and Anya get ready to leave, Anya surprises Tara by grabbing her in a quick hug.  “This is just a friend hug.  I am not wishing to have sex with you.”  She states stepping back smiling. 

Tara can’t help but laugh.  “Thanks Anya.  I appreciate everything.” 

Anya’s smile gets even bigger. 

Xander leans down and gently hugs the blonde Wiccan.  “I wish we could do more.”  He whispers in her ear before releasing her and turning to leave with Anya.

Standing there slightly stunned Tara comes back to herself, feeling Buffy grasp her hand lightly.  Looking over at the slayer she smiles tremulously.  “I always thought that if something happened between Willow and I… that I would lose your friendships.”   Shaking her head, looking at the now closed front door that Anya and Xander had walked through.  “I guess I was wrong.”

Buffy lightly squeezes Tara’s hand.  “You’re family, remember?  Once you’re in our hearts, you stay there.”  Smiling softly she tugs on the hand she’s holding.  “Come on, let’s get upstairs and get you settled.” 

***

Chapter 7

Willow’s pissed.  Nobody trusts her, everybody’s against her.  Slamming into her parents’ house she quickly heads upstairs to her room.  Looking at the boxes that she had magically transported over she mumbles ‘Dispersio’ and waves her hand.  Everything finds its home in her room and the boxes disappear.  

Throwing her body down on top of her bed she gets angrier and angrier.  ‘I know Buffy is fucking Tara.  She’s always talking to her, being friendly with her.  I’ve caught Tara watching her all worried when we brought her back from the dead acting like I did wrong!  I’ll figure out what kind of spell she did and I’ll fix them both!’ 

Hearing her front doorbell ring, Willow teleports downstairs and looks out the front door, seeing Amy standing outside the door, the ex-rat still slightly twitchy from being a rat all those years.  Opening the door Willow sneers. “What do you want?”

Swallowing hard, Amy steels herself to do what she came here to do and go home to her father, finally.  “Willow can we talk?”

Rolling her eyes Willow throws the door open and heads into the living room plopping herself on the couch.

“W-Willow I don’t want to upset you.  First off, I really, really want to thank you for turning me back into a human.”  Amy stutters slightly, scared of the woman that is so different from the girl she once knew.

“Welcome.  Now can you get on with it?  I’ve got things to do.”  Willow sighs dramatically.

“Okay.  I’ll make it quick.”  Looking up into Willow’s eyes Amy quickly states.  “I think you really should look into getting some help.  You’re starting to act like my mother before she went crazy.  I like you Willow and I don’t want to see you on the wrong side.  And I’m leaving Sunnydale.  I’m going to hook-up with my dad.”  Quickly standing Amy looks down at Willow who’s just sitting there looking at her like she’s a bug that crawled out from under a rock.  “Thanks again Willow.  Please think about what I said.”  Quickly scurrying from Willow’s house, Amy leaves.

“Well, wasn’t that interesting?  Little Miss Rat thinks I need help.”  Standing up stretching slightly Willow grins evilly.  “Screw her.  I’m in control and I don’t need anyone!  I’ll get what I want.  I just have to figure out how.”  Laughing slightly hysterically Willow locks the door with a wave of her hand and literally pops herself upstairs into her room and into bed.

***

Smiling and saying goodbye to Toni, a girl in her Art History class, Tara starts to head home.  Her last class of the day had been cancelled and she was feeling happy and a little more relaxed.  She has been moved back into the Summers’ residence for three weeks and has only caught glimpses of Willow occasionally on the college campus.  It seems the redhead has been lying low lately, not talking with anyone.

Frowning slightly Tara shakes her head, thinking that not even Xander had been able to get Willow to talk.  He had headed over to her house four different times, trying to talk some sense in her.  He couldn’t believe that she was the same person.  All she did was sneer at him and told him to go be friends with her ex-lover and Buffy, since they were ‘living’ together, and slammed the door in his face.  That was the first time he went to her house, the other three she didn’t even bother opening the door.  Xander was positive the hacker had been home.

Thinking as she’s walking, Tara doesn’t realize that Willow has shown up beside her until she feels a firm grip on her arm, yanking her to a stop.  Quickly jerking her head up Tara pulls back away from the redhead.  “W-w-w-willow.  What d-do you w-w-want?”  Tara stutters horribly, scared at the look in the redhead’s eyes.

“I want you, but Buffy has made sure I don’t get you back, hasn’t she?”  Willow responds hatefully. 

Tara tries to refute the statement but Willow just waves her hand in a dismissive gesture.  “Yeah, like I’m going to believe you.  As soon as I moved out she moved you right in, didn’t she?  I know you always liked her.  Is she a great lay?  Does she do it better or different than me?  Enjoy it while you can.  As soon as I figure out this little spell you did, I’m going to make every one of you guys forget everything that happened, and you and I will move into our own place, happy and fucking like rabbits!  Or maybe I’ll just have you doing me?  How about that?  No pleasure for you and you’ll be happy as a clam.”  Eyes turning black Willow disappears in a heartbeat.

Shaking uncontrollably Tara heads quickly to a bench to sit down and collect herself.  ‘Goddess, I hope Giles has found something to help us.  She’s getting worse.  I have to talk to Buffy.’  Looking down at her watch she realizes the Slayer should be getting ready to have a break at the DMP in roughly fifteen minutes and if she hurries she should make it there in time.

***

Breathing heavily Tara takes a moment trying to catch her breath before heading into the DMP.  Walking in she sees Buffy behind the counter.

Looking up Buffy notices Tara and the haunted, scared look on her face and looks at the clock.  Realizing it is close enough to break time, she quickly turns to the girl next to her.  “I’m taking my lunch break.”  The girl nods her head.

Grabbing a couple drinks, Buffy heads over to meet Tara.  “Why don’t we sit outside?”  Buffy quietly suggests.

Nodding her head in agreement, Tara follows Buffy outside sitting down staring kind of lost out across the road.  Jerking when she feels a warm hand gently touching hers she looks up quickly, realizing it’s Buffy and smiles slightly before looking at the soda sitting in front of her. 

“Tara, what’s wrong?”  Buffy asks worriedly.

Closing her eyes and taking a deep, calming breath, she opens them to look in the slayer’s eyes.  “W-willow paid me a visit a few minutes ago at school.  Buffy, I think she’s getting worse.”  Tara whispers with a tear sliding down her cheek. 

“Tell me.”  Buffy states calmly.  As the blonde explains the brief but sickening story of what the redhead had said, Buffy feels herself getting angrier and angrier at the redhead.  Seeing the worry on Tara’s face Buffy makes herself calm down.

“I’ll call Giles tonight when I get home to see if he or the coven has come up with something.  If there’s anything we can do, we have to do it soon.”  Lightly running her hand down Tara’s forearm Buffy stops, gently grasping the arm and shifting it to look closer.  Seeing the redness of a hand print and knowing it’s going to bruise.  “Did she do this?”

Frowning Tara looks down, not even realizing that her arm was bruising from where Willow had grabbed her.  “She must have.  I-I didn’t even notice.”

“God Tara.  We need to protect you.  You did the charms for protection against magic, but that isn’t going to help you if she gets physical.”  Swallowing hard Buffy tries to think what she can do.  “The rest of us should be okay.  She’s mad at me, but I can take care of myself.  Dawn, Xander and Anya haven’t done anything to her, so she shouldn’t go after them.  We need to get some kind of bodyguard for you.  God I wish I didn’t have to work!”  Buffy runs her hand through her hair trying to figure out something.

“Buffy, I’ll be okay.  I’ll try to make sure someone is around me, okay?”  Tara states seeing how upset Buffy is getting.  

Knowing that that isn’t good enough Buffy agrees for the time being.  “Okay.  But on days that I don’t work, or that I can, I’m walking you to and from school, understood?” 

“Okay.”  Tara whispers, looking down hating to be a burden on Buffy.  Taking a sip of her soda Tara looks back up.  “Are you sure it wouldn’t be easier…”

Growling slightly under her breath Buffy shakes her head no.  “Tara, this conversation is NOT happening again.  You are not leaving.  You are staying here.  End of story.  Is that understood?”

Nodding her head looking down Tara quietly sighs.  “Understood.”

Shaking her head at the blonde’s lack-luster response, Buffy gets up to quickly kneel by the blonde’s side.  Lightly placing her hand on Tara’s thigh Buffy scoots down to catch Tara’s downcast eyes.  “No, you don’t understand, and I’m going to make you understand right now.  You are family.  We all love you.  Dawn, Xander, Anya and myself.  We all worry about you.  Please put this idea out of your head once and for all that we would all be better off with you gone.  Please?”  Buffy begs quietly looking up into the blonde’s sad blue eyes, with tears in her own.  Realizing that if Tara did leave the Wiccan would be taking a big chunk of her heart with her. 

Seeing the honest sincerity in the slayer’s eyes Tara watches as one of the tears slips down Buffy’s cheek.  Gently reaching up and wiping it away with her thumb Tara smiles and nods.  “All of you love me, I’m family and I belong here.  I understand.  No more thoughts about leaving.  None.” 

“Stay here, I’ll be back in a few minutes.”  Buffy hops up and quickly runs inside the DMP.

Looking down at her arm, running her fingers over the bruise forming Tara frowns.  How could things have gone so, so wrong. 

“Tara, let me walk you home.”  Buffy quietly states, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.  “I talked to my boss, telling her I needed a little longer break because a friend was in trouble.  So come on, let’s go.” 

Tara smiles in gratitude, standing up quickly.  Starting to reach down to get her book bag, Buffy beats her to it.  Slinging it over a shoulder and holding out her hand for Tara’s hand.  Looking up briefly, seeing the worry and caring in the slayer’s eyes, she slowly puts her hand in Buffy’s.  

***

“Why don’t you go upstairs and lay down for a little while?”  Buffy smiles as Tara nods and heads up the stairs.  Listening, she hears the door gently close behind her and Buffy grabs the phone, heading out the back door. 

“Anya, can you talk?”  Buffy swallows hard at what she has to tell the woman.  “Willow made a surprise visit to Tara on the campus today.  She’s completely out of control.  She grabbed Tara and Tara’s going to be bruised from it.  Willow’s threatening to wipe everyone’s memories, so do you have any ideas?...  No, no.  You can’t bring D’Hoffryn into this…  We just need to figure out something ourselves to do…  I would prefer to be with Tara 24/7, but I have to work…  No, I know you and Xander can’t do it, either…  I’m going to call Giles again…  No, just if you have any ideas, please let me know.  Thanks, Anya.”

Taking a deep breath, Buffy dials another number.  “Come on Giles!  Pick up the goddamn phone. …GILES!… Have you come up with anything?…  DAMN IT!…  NO! I will not calm down…  Willow has gone off the deep end, she’s hurt Tara…  No not bad, but it’s only a matter of time…  Giles, Willow is threatening to wipe all our memories.”  Hesitating and taking a breath she decides to give him more details. “She told Tara she was going to wipe her memories and make her, her personal sex slave…  YES!  I’m afraid she’s going to physically hurt Tara, I can’t watch her all the time, I have to work…  Do you have any ideas?  I’m completely desperate here!”  Roughly wiping the tears that had escaped her eyelids, she listened to Giles.  “Do it.  If you’re sure that she’s improved and actually wants to do good, do it…  GILES!! I would make a deal with the fucking devil right now, okay?  Get it done.  I have to go, bye.”

‘I hope to God that Faith is on our side again.  She would definitely be the best protection for Tara if I can’t be there.’  Buffy thinks, heading back in the house.  Quickly heading upstairs Buffy knocks lightly on Tara’s door before easing it open.  Seeing the blonde lying there on the bed curled up in a ball, holding the pillow tight to her almost breaks her heart.  Kneeling down beside the bed, gently running her fingers through Tara’s blonde hair, Buffy watches her for a few minutes.  Hearing the front door open downstairs, Buffy quickly leaves the sleeping blonde and goes down to meet Dawn. 

“Dawn, Tara’s upstairs lying down.  Please try to be quiet, she needs to rest.”  Slowly and haltingly Buffy tells Dawn what happened without giving her the complete details. “Please keep the phone with you, and go upstairs and stay with her, until I get back from work, okay?  I talked to Giles and he’s going to get Faith out of prison and have her come here to help protect Tara.”

Dawn is trying not to cry.  “Buffy, do you trust Faith?”

Looking at Dawn, Buffy frowns slightly.  “Dawn, Giles insisted that Faith was being a model prisoner and really does want to make amends.  I know she has good in her Dawn, she just got lost for a while.  And honestly, I feel partly responsible.”  Buffy looks down for a moment, collecting her thoughts.  “I believe if we had actually worked with her more, maybe had her stay with us instead of in the flea-bag hotels, if she had felt like family she wouldn’t have gone to Mayor Wilkins for the approval we should have given her.”

“If you’re willing to trust her, I will.”  Dawn states quietly before heading upstairs.

“And if she does anything to harm any of us, I’ll take her out permanently this time.”  Buffy growls too lowly for Dawn to hear as she heads out the door and back to work.

***

Chapter 8

“It seems you’ve been pardoned, Faith.”  The guard comments as she unlocks the cage to let Faith out. 

Jerking her head up at the word pardoned Faith looks confused.  “What the hell are you talkin’ about?”  She growls out. 

“You’re pardoned, free to go.  Got your walking papers.  Damn girl, how hard is it to understand?  Get your shit and let’s get you out of here.”  The guard states, not understanding herself, but orders were orders.

Faith looked at what meager belongings she had in the cell and walks out, not taking anything with her.  “Don’t need none of that.” 

***

Signing for her stuff, dressed in her leather pants, leather jacket and tank top she looks at a set of keys in the bag.  “What the hell are these?  I didn’t have these before.”  She states looking at the woman.

“Was told to give them to you.  Something about you would understand.”  The woman shrugs and goes back to work, ignoring the ex-con.

Shrugging her shoulders, Faith heads out of the prison.  Waiting for the guards to open the last set of gates she sees a Harley Sportster sitting outside.  Looking at the keys in her hand she raises an eyebrow.  Walking up to the Harley, she sees an 8x10 envelope taped to the seat with her name on it.  Quickly opening it, she starts to read, her eyes opening wide Faith shakes her head, quickly finishing the letter, she opens the other smaller, thicker envelope.  Pulling out $500 in cash she frowns.  “What the fuck is going on B?”  She says to herself before grabbing the helmet putting it on, tucking the money in her pocket, and starts up the motorcycle.  “Sunnydale, here I come.”  Before taking off in a cloud of dust.

***

“Hello.”  Buffy answers the phone.  “Giles, anything new?...  You got her pardoned?  Good…  I’m surprised it happened this quick.  I would have thought it would have taken a couple months, not just a few weeks…  Hell no I’m not complaining…  No, we haven’t heard anything from her since her surprise visit to Tara at school…  I think she’s staying low, trying to figure out a way around Tara’s spell…  I don’t know.  Tara seems pretty sure she shouldn’t be able to work around the charms as long as we don’t take them off we should be fine…  When should Faith be here?…  Okay, I’ll keep an eye out…  Giles?…  Thanks for everything.”

Looking out at the night Buffy stands at the back door, holding the phone in her hand thinking.  Shaking her head she looks down at the floor.  ‘God, Willow.  Are you a lost cause?  Is it going to come down to me fighting you?  Are you my next Big Bad?’  Sighing Buffy turns with slumped shoulders to hang the phone up and head back to the living room.  Sadly smiling at the sight that had become commonplace.  Tara’s curled up in the corner of the couch, with Dawn lying stretched out on the couch with her head in the blonde’s lap, Tara running her fingers lightly through her hair while they watch television. 

Both woman and teenager finding comfort in the soft caress.  “Faith should be here sometime tonight.”  Buffy quietly states, sitting down on the opposite end of the couch. 

“Buffy, shouldn’t you be out on patrol?”  Tara questions.

“I’ll wait.”  Buffy reaches out, and lightly runs her hand across Dawn’s leg. 

Smiling at the Disney cartoon they’re watching Buffy laughs quietly.  “I like the talking donkey the best.”

“What?   Shrek is the best character out of all of them!”  Dawn takes up the challenge.

Smiling slightly Tara looks at Buffy then Dawn.  “Personally, I like Fiona.  For an Ogre she’s extremely pretty.  And who can resist a woman that can kick serious ass?”   Trying not to laugh at the looks that are coming from both Buffy and Dawn, she bites her bottom lip lightly, before smiling her crooked grin at them both, making them laugh.

“Okay, so we know if we come home and find a 7’ female ogre in the house, it’s Tara’s girlfriend and we shouldn’t be worried.”  Buffy winks at Dawn.

Actually laughing out loud Tara smiles.  “Yes, there will be no staking my big green girlfriend.” 

Buffy smiles, genuinely happy to hear Tara laugh and joke.  She’s been too withdrawn lately and it was starting to worry her. 

Hearing a motorcycle pull up in the driveway, Buffy hops up off the couch and opens the front door.  Seeing Faith taking her helmet off Buffy turns and looks at the two sitting on the couch, looking at her in concern.  “It’s Faith.  Can you two stay in here while I let her know what’s going on?”  Receiving nods Buffy smiles slightly before closing the door behind her as she walks outside. 

“Faith.”  Buffy states, walking up to the brunette.

“B.  What the fuck is going on?  I know it has to be bad if you’re wantin’ me out of jail and here.”  Faith asks bluntly.

“Faith, this is worse than bad.  I got to have your word that you’re on our side.  I’m trusting you with all our lives, Faith.  I screwed up before with you and you screwed up.  It doesn’t make it right, but I want to get past it.  I need you Faith.”  Buffy looked in Faith’s eyes, holding them, letting her know that she’s deadly serious and not joking around.  “I. Need.  You.”

Faith nods, seeing Buffy is serious and ready to trust her.  “B… Buffy I’m here for you.  I fucked up, but I want to make it up to you.  If need be, I’ll die making up for my mistakes.  I promise.”

Seeing the sincerity in the brunette’s eyes, Buffy nods her head.  “Hopefully it won’t come to that.  Meet me on the back porch.  I want to let Tara and Dawn know everything’s okay and that we’re going to finish the discussion out there so they don’t get worried about us.”

“Sure, B.”  Faith heads around back, wondering to herself exactly what’s going on.

***

“I haven’t had a chance to tell her about what’s happening yet.  I just wanted to set my own mind at ease about her being on our side.”  Buffy states quietly.

“Buffy, if you want I can read her aura, it tells me a lot about a person.  I wouldn‘t do it normally.”  Tara offers.

Studying the blonde for a moment she nods her head.  “Please.  I feel comfortable, but it won’t hurt to be doubly sure.  Could she… change her aura if she knows about it?”

“No.  You can’t change that.  It’s literally who you are.”  Tara shakes her head slightly. 

“What does my aura say?”  Buffy questions as they head towards the kitchen. 

Tara smiles.  “I don’t read your aura, Buffy.  It’s kind of a personal thing and I don’t do it, unless I have a very good reason.” 

“Good to know.”  Buffy opens the door.  “Let me talk to her first, okay?”

Nodding, Tara precedes Buffy out onto the back porch, looking at Faith speculatively.  “F-faith.” 

Turning around, Faith slowly appraises the shapely blonde.  Frowning slightly she realizes the woman looks familiar.  “You’re familiar.  Why?”  Faith asks.

“W-we met b-before, at the B-bronze.”  Tara stutters. 

“Right!  When I was in B’s body, you‘re Red‘s girl.”  Tilting her head, Faith appraises the blonde with closer scrutiny.

Tara closes her eyes and turns away for a moment, feeling the pain still slice through her heart at the betrayal of the redhead.

“No, she’s not Willow’s girl anymore.”  Buffy interrupts quickly, giving Faith a warning look. 

“Sorry.  Didn’t know.”  Faith mumbled kicking her foot against the board.  ‘Great Faith, here five minutes and already pissing everyone off.’

Tara turns and watches Faith.  “You didn’t know, Faith.  N-no need to b-be sorry.”  Tara says in a soft, quiet voice. 

Looking up into the sad blue eyes Faith nods.  “No, but I remember I was a bitch to you that night.  I’m sorry for that.”  Faith mumbles looking back down. 

Tara smiles sadly.  “You’re forgiven.  Buffy go ahead and tell her, make sure it’s okay so you two can talk.”

Faith frowns looking from Blondie to B.  “What’s up?”

“Faith, I’d like your permission for Tara to read your aura.  I don’t know if you realize it or not, but she’s the reason the rest of the group knew our bodies were switched.   Will you let her?”  Buffy asks without preamble.

Faith looks in shock from B to the blonde.  “You’re askin’ my permission?  You could’ve done it without my permission, so why ya’ askin’ for?”

“Because I don’t want to do it behind your back.  Tara offered, but she doesn’t like doing it without a good reason.”  Shrugging her shoulders Buffy looks at Faith.  “Simple as that.”

Faith looks at them both.  “Go ahead and do it.  It ain’t gonna hurt or anything is it?” 

Tara smiles reassuringly at the brunette.  “No, Faith it won’t hurt.  You actually won’t feel anything.  Are you sure?” 

Nodding her head Faith just looks at the blonde.

Unfocusing Tara lets herself feel Faith’s aura.  She’s calmer, more focused, a lot of pain, the anger is still there, but controlled, no longer controlling her, guilt for past actions, the need to make amends.  Focusing back in, Tara realizes the brunette is hurting for more reasons than one. “She won’t hurt us.”  Tara states quickly disappearing in the house and shutting the door behind her.    

Buffy’s eyes follow Tara worriedly.  Rubbing her hand over her face she turns to face Faith.  “Okay, here’s everything that’s happened.”  Buffy explains everything from the mind spell Willow had put on Tara, up to her threatening her at the college, everything that was said and done.  Finally finishing Buffy looks at the stunned look of disbelief on Faith’s face.  “Faith, I’m really, really afraid Willow has reached the no return zone.  The main reason you’re here, is to make absolutely positively sure that Tara isn’t harmed.  Keeping everybody else safe would be helpful, but I doubt Willow will hurt anyone.  Helping me out with Slaying duties, I would greatly appreciate any help you can be, we can take turns so that way someone is always with Tara.”  Looking up into the dark soulful brown eyes of the Dark Slayer, Buffy frowns slightly.  “Faith, I’m not going to force you to do this.  It’s entirely your decision.  I just want you to know I need you.”

“And if I say no?”  Faith has to ask, knowing that she can’t leave.  She needs to do everything possible to make up to these people for her past mistakes.

“You have wheels, you have the cash to get far away.  You’re pardoned.  For all intents and purposes Faith, you are free and clear.  I won’t chase you.”  Buffy appraises the brunette, wondering what’s going through her mind. 

Nodding her head Faith looks out into the yard.  “I’m in it for the long haul, B.  Tell me what you need done, and I’ll do it.”  Reaching into her back pocket, she pulls out the $400 cash she has left.  “Here, this is all I got left.  Between gas and food…”  Faith shrugs.

Buffy looks at the offering.  “Keep it.  It’s probably the only cash you’re going to have.  I’m working to make ends meet.  It’s a struggle, even with Tara giving me all the money she gets from her grants for housing and stuff.” 

Faith frowns at what Buffy’s saying, realizing that the blonde is probably living on an extremely tight budget.

“Come on, Faith.  Let’s go in.  I need to do a quick patrol and Tara has a necklace for you.  Wear it at all times.  It’ll keep you protected from Willow’s magic.”  Turning and heading into the house, she doesn’t bother waiting for a reply. 

Taking a deep breath, Faith quickly follows her in.

***

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